Music List

My current playlist (right margin):

1. David Cook: Come Back to Me
2. Adam Lambert: Mad World
3. Black Eyed Peas: Boom Boom Pow
4. Paramore: Decode
5. David Cook: Permanent. Written about David's brother, who passed away in early May from cancer. This song chokes me up.
6. My Chemical Romance: The Ghost of You
7. Robert Pattinson: Let Me Sign
8. Pink: Sober
9. Staind (probably my favorite band, along with MCR): Believe
10. Hinder: Without You
11. David Cook: Light On
12. Staind: Everything Changes
13. Robert Pattinson: Never Think
14. Goo Goo Dolls: Iris
15. 30 Seconds to Mars: From Yesterday
16. Staind: So Far Away
17. Evanescence: My Immortal
18. Rihanna: Take a Bow
19. 30 Seconds to Mars: The Kill
20. Staind: It's Been Awhile
21. Beyonce: If I Were a Boy
22. Creed: My Sacrifice
23. The Fugees: Killing Me Softly
24. Chad Kroeger: Hero
25. Phil Collins: Take Me Home
26. Staind: Outside
27. Beyonce: Halo
28. Seether featuring Amy Lee: Broken
29. Carrie Underwood: I Told You So
30. Staind: Right Here
31. My Chemical Romance: Helena
32. My Chemical Romance: Thank You for the Venom
33. Ra: Do You Call My Name?
34. Green Day: Know Your Enemy
    

I often listen to my music player in one browser window while visiting websites in another window.

Errands, Summer shopping, Pesto

The kids and I got groceries yesterday and also did a little shopping. Sean needed lighter-colored T-shirts (got four at Old Navy, including an orange Transformers T-shirt) for these warm, sunny days and Kelly needed a couple pairs of shorts (cotton Bermuda, 1 white, 1 orange, at Target) to wear at the beach. The ones she wore to the beach in April gave her a rash/sore spot on her belly where the snap touched her skin.

I also had to return some movies to the video store, pick up a few more storage bins/boxes at Lowe's, pay the car insurance and my life insurance before going to Olive Garden for supper. I didn't have much of an appetite for some reason and only ate a little of my soup and one breadstick. I'm pretty hungry right now though. :-/

After supper, we went to Target (groceries & Kelly's shorts; I also bought David Cook's CD), Old Navy (Sean's shirts), the gas station, the barber shop to get Sean's hair cut (it looks really good) and then Food Lion for the rest of the groceries before coming home.

I thought about going to Borders to see if I couldn't find a book or two that might interest me, but not only was I a little too tired for that, I'd also like to get a few more books read that I already own before buying anymore. We'll see how long I can resist buying more books before getting the stack on my nightstand shorter.

A few of the things I bought at the grocery store were ingredients for pesto sauce. (Fresh basil, pine nuts, parmesan. I already had olive oil, salt, pepper and garlic.) I've never made nor tasted pesto sauce, but I've been wanting to make it and try it for awhile now. I found a recipe for it by Giada Whats-Her-Face at FoodNetwork.com. I bought some fettucini for the pesto and I have some gnocchi that I bought at World Market a few days ago that I may try with the pesto also.

Yes, I changed it already.

The lined "paper" of the previous layout was starting to get on my nerves.

Another Vacation

Looks like we'll be going to the beach again this year. (We went to Southport/Oak Island in late April and had a lovely time.) Charlie's sister Gail in Oklahoma is coming down in late June and wants us all to go to the beach together. Her daughter Rachel, her grandson Jayden (Amanda's son) and possibly a friend of Rachel's will be joining her. Charlie and Gail's sister Sheila (who lives in Cary), Sheila's ex-husband David (I guess they're sort of back together), and their children Matthew and Samantha will also be coming.

It was left up to me to arrange things. They don't care which beach, so I looked at places in Oak Island, Southport, the Carolina Beach area (which includes Kure Beach and Ft. Fisher) and the Outer Banks. I found a place for a very decent price in Kure Beach and reserved it for us a few minutes ago. The house, which sleeps 13, was recently remodeled (including hardwood floors) and redecorated, so while it isn't as cute as other beach houses on the outside (there are some beautiful, colorful beach houses in Kure Beach that I love looking at when we're in the area), it does look nice on the inside.




I hope everyone likes the house I reserved for us. Most houses don't sleep as many people as will be in our group (12) and with it being somewhat short notice, there wasn't a lot available. Unfortunately, we have to bring our own sheets, towels, toilet paper and paper towels. The kitchen's got everything we need though. Charlie wants us to prepare a lot of our meals ourselves. That's a lot of people to cook for. I'm a little stressed thinking about it. Not that I expect to do all the cooking, but I do expect to share in the responsibility. I thought this was going to be a vacation. Shouldn't "vacation" include not having to cook? But then what mother ever gets a true vacation. We are "the great vacationless class".

Still, I am looking forward to going to the coast again. I think this'll be the first time I ever went to the beach twice in one year since moving away from there 26 years ago.

My kids and their Bibles

I mentioned in a recent entry that I bought Sean and Kelly each a Bible. (King James Version, if anyone's wondering. I love the style of it and I think it's good for them, educationally, to be exposed to it while they're young. It's the kind of Bible I grew up reading.) They love their Bibles and read them every night before bed, though I don't tell them to. Some nights I tell them they need to go right to sleep and they'll practically beg me to let them read their Bibles first.

Sean has started at Genesis 1 and is wanting to read the whole Bible. (He's on Genesis 6 now.) I'm not sure what Kelly's method is. Maybe she just reads whatever she turns to. Or maybe she chooses a book of the Bible with a name she likes. Perhaps I'll ask her, if I don't forget.

Some nights, Sean has questions about spiritual matters or Biblical teachings and we'll spend hours talking. (I'm usually the one trying to wrap things up, only for Sean to ask another question.) I try to explain things to him as clearly as possible. He's always really liked church, gospel music and other things of that nature. When I was pregnant with him, I prayed that God would use him someday. I can't help but wonder where his path will take him. Needless to say, I love that he's so interested in God and the Bible.

I have a lot of preaching messages on tape and the other day Sean asked to listen to a couple of them. I put one in as I was cleaning my room (not that it was terribly messy) and folding laundry. When that message was done, I put in another one and we listened to it while I cooked supper.

I hope that he will always love the things of God and that Kelly will become as interested as Sean is. Could just be though that she's one of those quiet ones who keep things mostly to themselves.

Dog groomin'

Lord have mercy, is my back stiff. It's always stiff after I cut Pippin's hair, which I do while sitting on the floor. He's mostly cooperative during the process. He spends most of the time lying on his side. So I cut one side, lifting his legs to get to his belly and chest, and then flip him over and cut the other side. I make him stand or lie on his belly when I cut his face, neck, back and ears. I have to use scissors to cut him, which takes an hour or two to do, because he doesn't like the clippers.

Once his hair is cut, I slowly work my way back to a standing position (I'm only 36, for Heaven's sake), knock any fur that's on me onto the floor, and then vacuum up all the little cream-colored curly hairs.

I suppose I could put him on the dining room table or the counter to cut him, but that would be kind of gross. I don't like animals on places where I prepare food or where we eat.

Maybe one of these days I'll bring him to a professional. My back would appreciate that.

Warning: A Little Sap

I'm feeling a little blue at the moment. Maybe it's because Charlie's been gone almost three weeks now. I really hate it when his job keeps him away for so long. Does it make me a weak woman to need my husband so much? I really do feel like half of me is missing when he's gone. I'm incomplete without him.

"These two shall be one flesh."

Our Monday

Kelly and I did some shopping yesterday at World Market, Bed Bath and Beyond, Target and Borders. (Sean was with my mom.) I got those copper canisters I saw at World Market the other day. My current canisters are old, plastic and ugly. I also got the Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives (which I often accidentally call "Drivers, Divers and Dives") recipe book, Lost in Austen DVD, a lemon zester, ice cream scooper, pepper mill with matching salt shaker, an iron (my old one has been cracked for years), three more storage boxes for Kelly's stuff (to go under her bed) at Lowe's and a mug with a picture of Venice on it.

I bought the kids each their own Bible. They only had little New Testaments and Sean had a Bible my mom got him a few years ago that's falling apart. I also got Sean a Bakugan case and Kelly an elf fairy action figure and a fairy on a horse. When we were in the check-out line at Food Lion later, she had the fairy on the horse with her. Something about the horse caught my eye. I turned it over and whadya know - it's a boy. Wearing pink roses no less. A very anatomically correct horse. Okay.

We had dinner at Bianca's. I got the chicken picatta, as I always do, and Kelly got the spaghetti and meatballs. Their food is so good. I don't know why Charlie doesn't like it much. I'd like to go more often. (Not that Charlie's home enough to go with me.) It's delicious authentic Italian food.

After the kids went to bed last night, I fell asleep on the couch watching Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. I slept for about an hour and a half and then watched Jane Eyre on DVD. The one with William Hurt. I rented it yesterday, along with Henry Poole is Here and The Visitor.

Tidbits

It's been a little over a week now since I quit taking Yaz and so far no headaches. I hope they're really gone for good. They made me miserable; sometimes to the point of nausea.

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Have you ever had someone ruin something you once enjoyed? I remember back when I was in my late teens to around twenty, a perfume called Escape was popular with my friends. I thought it smelled really wonderful, but never bought a bottle myself.

When I was twenty, I began working at a shoe store here in Greensboro. My boss (Deborah) wore Escape perfume. That alone was enough to make me no longer interested in buying and wearing it. (I remember wearing Giorgio at that age. I now wear Beyond Paradise.) But to make things worse, she began having an affair with my dad. Yeah, that pretty much completely ruined it for me.

Then one day my mom came storming into the store, grabbed me by the hand and dragged me out. She said, in a less than quiet voice, that I was not coming back to work for that "whore". Soon after I quit, Deborah moved in with my dad, who had left Mom or had been kicked out by her.

All these years later, I can't smell Escape without it reminding me of Deborah. :-/

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We got our state refund yesterday. (Federal came about a month ago.) Charlie (who's still in Texas) asked me if there was anything I've been wanting. Hmm. Haven't really thought about it really. My main buying interest for the past few months has been books. I did see a copper canister set at World Market that I really liked. And I've been wanting to get a pepper mill. I'm really into cooking and making things from scratch lately. Nothing else comes to mind at the moment. Maybe I'll just go to World Market and grab a few things.

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Underneath Sean's toe nail (the one on his right big toe that he sprained) the color has changed from light purple to nearly black. It's still sore of course, but he's doing okay.

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I watched Lost in Austen late Thursday night. I really liked it. There are several humorous moments that made me laugh out loud. I recommend it to anyone who's a fan of Pride and Prejudice. Yes, things get changed in the story, but it's still enjoyable to watch.

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I added a few songs to my music player. (In the right margin.) "I Told You So" by Carrie Underwood (originally done by Randy Travis), "Against All Odds" by Phil Collins, "Right Here" by Staind, two songs by David Cook ("Permanent" and "Come Back to Me") and "Mad World" by Adam Lambert.

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Breakfast for supper is one of my favorite things. Last night I made French toast for Kelly and pancakes for me and Sean. :-)

I may make rigatoni with tomato cream sauce tonight or salisbury steak with homemade macaroni and cheese. Haven't decided yet.

Hopalong; Sweet Girl

I had to take Sean to the doctor today. He hurt the big toe on his right foot playing soccer at school. Turned out to be a sprain. I had to get groceries today and didn't want his hobbling to slow me down, so I dropped him off at Mom's after we left the doctor's office.

Kelly and I then dropped off some things at Goodwill before going to Olive Garden for supper. From there we went to World Market (passing an accident scene - motorcycle & car - on the way) to browse around. An Australian friend of mine who lives in Hong Kong has wanted me to try Tim Tams for awhile now. I thought World Market would have them, but they don't. I didn't leave empty-handed though. I got some chocolate covered hazelnut squares (Lindt), a pack of gnocchi and a glass olive oil jar.

We then went to Target for what grocery items I can get there, got gas, went to Macy's (I really needed a new bra) and then Food Lion for the rest of the groceries.

After bringing the groceries home, I got Sean from Mom's and then went to Lowe's. Kelly was in desperate need of more storage. I bought three clear, plastic bins with lids to go under her bed.

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I had to stop at a light and wait to make a right turn on the way to Target. While sitting there, I saw a woman and her little girl (about three or four years old) walking down the sidewalk. The little girl, with her brown shoulder-length hair, light yellow lace-bottomed leggings and blue and white sleeveless top that reached her hip area (do four-year-olds even have hips?), saw these little flowers (possibly weeds) in the grassy area between the sidewalk and the road and bent over to pick a few of them. She looked so sweet as she did so that it brought a lump to my throat. Yes, I'm a sap.

A little shopping and American Idol

Kelly and I did a little shopping yesterday. (Sean was with Mom.) I bought two books - A Walk in the Woods by Bill Bryson and Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. Kelly bought herself a Magic Tree House book. I also bought Kelly three skirts and three shirts at The Children's Place.She's wearing the white shirt and multi-colored tiered skirt today.

We ate supper at San Luis Mexican restaurant. We had never eaten there before, but someone said it was the best they'd had in Greensboro. I thought it was just okay. Monterrey's is still the best to my taste buds.

After leaving San Luis, we went to the video store. Kelly got a Hannah Montana game and I rented three movies - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (watched it last night; it was kind of good), Lost in Austen, and Last Chance Harvey.

When we got home and were gathering our things out of the car, Kelly asked where Amber was. (Her orange tabby stuffed cat.) I asked her if she had left it at the restaurant and she said she might have and started crying. She's had that stuffed cat since she was a toddler (or younger). When we got inside the house, I called the restaurant and they had it there. So we had to go all the way back and get it.

After getting online for awhile, the kids and I watched American Idol. It was a good show with great performances. Adam was fantastic singing with Queen and Kiss. When it came time to announce the winner, the kids and I were on the edge of our seat, hoping to hear Adam's name called. We were ready to scream and cheer. Then we heard Kris announced as the winner and we were disappointed.

Kris is entirely too boring to me. I agree with what a local radio station said - he's a cookie-cutter pop star and apparently that's what America likes. His style reminds me of singers like Jason Mraz, The Plain White T's and other mellow singers like them. Far too blah. The kind of music that makes me change the station.

Still, Adam not being named American Idol means he's free to make whatever kind of record he likes. So that's some consolation. I knew that beforehand, but it would've been nice to scream and cheer if he had been named the winner.

What does Christianity have to do with it?

I was flipping through the channels last night, trying to find something interesting to watch. I stopped on Fox News and watched a little of The O'Reilly Factor, a show I've only seen bits of once or twice. I'm not normally interested in politics or political programs.

Bill O'Reilly was talking to a man (whose name I didn't catch) about the final two American Idol contestants - Adam Lambert and Kris Allen. They were talking about who they think will win the show. The other man said that five of the past AI winners came right out and said that they were Christians. And since most Americans claim to be Christians, they'll probably choose Kris Allen as this year's winner. According The Other Man, it's obvious that Kris is a Christian, even though he hasn't come out and said it, because he wears a cross necklace. I kind of had to shake my head at that. Since when does wearing a cross necklace mean that someone is a Christian? Don't some people wear them just because they're popular?

The Other Man also talked about how Adam Lambert is obviously gay because of pictures of him on the internet kissing other men. And since most Americans are Christians and believe homosexuality is a sin, Adam probably won't win.

I couldn't believe my ears. Since when is American Idol about voting for your favorite Christian or voting for a Christian at all? This isn't a Christian music contest. I'm a conservative Christian and I'm not going to vote for someone based on whether or not they're a Christian. Or based on if they're gay or straight. I'm voting (yes, I vote lol) for who I think the best singer is (The Other Man did say that he believes Adam is the best singer), and that would be Adam Lambert. He has a great voice and I like his style.

Flounder

Flopping around, mouth agape, eyes glazed over, confusion all over my face.

I need a change of scenery, something new in my life. Yeah, I've been singing that song for three years now. Yet here I am, in the same place as I was then.

"Maybe I'll try this."

"Maybe I'll try that."

"Maybe I'll go there or there."

"Or no, maybe over there."

I feel like I don't belong where I am. That I should be somewhere else and doing something else. Not instead of what I'm doing, but in addition to what I'm doing. But what? I don't know. I can't figure it out. I must be incredibly dense.

"God, it'd be nice if You'd lift the fog a bit."

Three years later and things are still as clear as mud.

Yodeling Cats

This made me laugh my butt off. (If only that were possible.) Yodeling cats.

Barking Behemoth

Apparently the folks in the corner house diagonally across from us have a new barking horse (aka, a big dog). I'm not sure what kind it is as I can't get a good view of him from this distance. I do know that his name is Chance. The lady who lives there came out the back French doors yesterday, told Chance to be quiet, and then brought him inside.

People often say that little dogs are yappy and bark at everything. Maybe Chance is a little dog in a big dog's body. He barks at Pippin (our toy poodle) when I take him out and at our across-the-street neighbors' puppy (a cream poodle mix named Ginger) when they take her outside to potty. Chance also stands at the back doors of his home, trying to look in, and barks, wanting to go inside.

I first noticed Chance yesterday morning when I took Pippin out to do his business. Chance began barking at Pippin, which made Pip nervous. He wanted to get back inside and not potty. I wanted to get back inside too. I couldn't really see Chance at first (a tree partially blocks my view) and was afraid he might come to our yard and attack Pippin.

I found out later that Chance is chained up, so that's good. Pippin's beginning to ignore Chance and do his business. Also good.

I don't mind the barking really. They keep him inside at night. I just don't like that his barking makes Pippin nervous. Too bad they don't have a privacy fence around their yard. Then Chance couldn't see Pippin or Ginger and wouldn't bark at them.

lol So this was a rather boring entry. Sorry for that.

Outlander - Review

I finished reading Outlander, by Diana Gabaldon, awhile ago. I was completely drawn in by it, often staying up much later than I should have. Aside from all the sex, it was a really good book. That doesn't mean that I don't like sex. lol I like it as much as the next woman. I just prefer not to see it or read about it in detail. Not that it was overwhelmingly detailed, but whenever Claire (the main character) and her husband were having sex, I would've preferred things faded to black sooner than they did.

There's also a brutal rape scene (Claire isn't the victim) that gets described by the victim a week or two after it happens.

Anyway, the story starts off in Scotland. The year is 1945 and Claire and her husband Frank (who are English) are on a second honeymoon in the Scottish Highlands, having not spent a lot of time together after their wedding before WWII began. Frank had been in the military and Claire had been an army nurse.

One day Claire is visiting a stone circle (similar to Stonehenge) and when she touches one of the stones, she is taken back to the year 1743. She immediately finds herself in a clash between Scottish Highlanders and British redcoats. She is taken away by a group of Scotsmen (who are suspicious of her, w/her British accent and strange ways) and tries to come up with a way to get back to the stone circle, hoping that if she touches it again she can return to 1945 and to her husband Frank.

In Outlander, Claire endures many hardships, but also finds new love. Though she's sometimes in situations that are hard to imagine anyone having the strength to endure, Claire is always strong. Even when she's trembling with fear, she stands up to whoever is assaulting her or threatening her. I like that the author didn't make her weak or a woman always in need of rescue.

The story ends with something of a cliffhanger. Though I knew before I started reading it that it was only part one of a six-part series. I'll probably start reading part two, Dragonfly in Amber, after I've read another book or two.

New Look

I've been wanting to change my blog layout for awhile. I even tried it a few times, only to lose my blogroll. And things just didn't look quite right overall. Well, I've finally found a way to change it so that it looks good and nothing is lost.

I'm using a layout found at Delightful Dots, but layouts I tried at The Cutest Blog on the Block worked well too.

Of course, changing my layout also meant changing my signature color. The yellow/gold wasn't showing up as well anymore. This'll be my first time seeing the green on the new background. Hopefully it'll show up clearly.

*edited in*
Hmm. The green isn't showing up that well either. Time to do some tweaking. The new signature should show up in the next entry.

It All Makes Sense Now

From time to time, I mention the fact that I have PCOS. It's done some very unpleasant things to my body, including causing me to gain weight. By early last year, I had lost 13 pounds without trying. (Because trying had never worked in the past.) That spring, I had to buy new clothes because my old clothes were too big for me. A great "problem" to have.

In June, I went to my ob/gyn for my yearly exam and he put me on a new birth control, Yaz. By late summer, the clothes I had just bought a few months prior were getting too small for me. I hadn't changed my diet, so I just figured it was PCOS messing with my body again. I also started getting headaches, but I didn't really pay attention to how frequently I got them. It wasn't until a month or so ago that Charlie and my mom started telling me that I should see my doctor about the headaches I've been getting. I get bad headaches every couple of weeks. Sometimes they only last for a day, other times 2-3 days, and medicine never takes them away no matter how much I take.

Anyway, so I was looking at some of the blogs of new members at Blogamama when I came across Sandy's blog Day to Day Life . On her blog she talks about quitting Yaz and feeling better now. The Yaz had caused her to have little to no energy (also an issue for me), headaches and weight gain.

Then the light bulb came on. Why hadn't I thought of that before? That it could be the Yaz causing my headaches and weight gain.

I'm about due for my yearly exam (they sent me a reminder a week or so ago) and when I go I plan on asking my doctor to put me back on Yasmin or some other birth control pill. It has to be a pill, in case anyone's wondering, to help control the PCOS symptoms. Though nothing seems to control it enough. :-/

Five Fabulous Addictions

My Five Fabulous Addictions:

1. Reading
2. Buying books
3. Collecting recipes (and trying them out).
4. Blogs (my own, as well as others).
5. Chocolate

Idea found here: Ramblings of a Fab Brunette

Problem Solved

Well, I finally got my internet issues fixed. Turned out to be something wrong with the new Firefox. Those of you with Firefox, if your internet connection seems to slow down considerably after updating (to version 3.0, I think it's called), there's a website you can go to that will lead you through steps you can take to get things back up to speed.

Click here.

Steps 1-4 worked for me. I also disabled AVG Safe Search 8.5 (Tools, Add-ons, Extensions). AVG is an anti-virus software you can download. I had read at MajorGeeks.com something about it possibly causing slow-down issues after updating (which I'd recently done), so I disabled it just in case. As well as disabling a bunch of plug-ins (Tools, Add-ons, Plugins), which I'll re-enable individually should the need arise.

It's so nice to be able to visit my favorite websites (MySpace, Facebook, blogs) easily again. It was beyond annoying when pages would take forever to load or not load at all. I actually had to use IE until I got Firefox fixed. *gasp* I prefer the look of Firefox to IE. Not to mention Firefox being safer to use than IE and more user-friendly.

Early Mother's Day, DH Gone Again

Since Charlie had to leave for Texas early Saturday morning, we went out for Mother's Day dinner Friday night. I was craving Mexican food, so we went to Monterrey's - the best Mexican restaurant I've ever been to. I love that place. The food was quite good. Flirty Waiter was there, but I don't know if he saw us or not. If he did, then he also saw that Charlie was with me. Which may be why he didn't stop by our table. Yeah, I was crying inside over that. :-/

We then did a little shopping. There were three books on my books-I-want list that I was hoping to get. We went to Barnes and Noble and I found all three - The French Lieutenant's Woman by John Fowles (Borders didn't have this one when I looked for it on Thursday), The Enchanted April by Elizabeth von Arnim, and The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society by Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows. Sean also got a book (Bakugan?) and Kelly got two books - one about the Titanic. I don't remember what the other is about.

After leaving Barnes and Noble, we went to Best Buy and bought The Tale of Despereaux and Men in Black on Blu-Ray.

That night, I had wanted to stay up until after Charlie got up (he was getting up at 4:30 AM) so that I could see him before he left for Texas, but I couldn't stay awake that long. I went to bed hoping that I would wake up when he did or when he kissed me good-bye, but I didn't.

The cell phone towers are down and new ones are being put up in the area of Texas where Charlie is working. Because of this, he and I have very little communication now. :-( The internet isn't working there either. The only time we can talk is if he goes into town, which isn't that close to where he's working. It's bad enough not being able to talk to him when he's so far away and I don't know when he'll get to come back home, but what really concerns me is not being able to get into contact with him should an emergency arise. I'm pretty good at keeping my temper under control and I rarely get into confrontational situations, but if something were to happen (God forbid) and I couldn't get up with Charlie, I might have to say something to Charlie's boss about sending my husband away from his family to a place where communication is nearly an impossibility.

Sure, I'm aware of the existence of these things called land-line phones, but who has those anymore? I don't have one. My almost-58-year-old mom doesn't have one. And I don't know if there's one in the house Charlie's staying in. He's always talked to me on his cell when he's been there and hasn't ever mentioned a land-line phone.

Anyway, *sigh* I really hope he's not gone long this time. He says it could be a month, but there's really no telling with this job.

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I started reading Outlander last week. I'm really enjoying this one. I had a hard time putting it down last night and was up much later than I should've been. I'll definitely be taking a nap today.

8 Things

8 Things I'm Looking Forward To:

1. Charlie coming home.
2. School ending for the year.
3. Summer.
4. Possibly going to the beach again.
5. Our house selling - someday. :-/
6. Buying a bigger house with more land and less neighbors.
7. Paying off our living room furniture. (Should be this summer.)
8.

8 Things I Did Yesterday:

1. Got up.
2. Fed the animals.
3. Wasted time online.
4. Cooked supper.
5. Did laundry.
6. Watched TV.
7. Read some more of Outlander.
8.

8 Things I Wish I Could Do:

1. Swim.
2. Lose weight. (PCOS won't let me. *shakes fist*)
3. Go canoeing.
4. Paint pictures.
5. Move to Southport.
6. Enjoy exercise. I hate it.
7.
8.

8 Shows I Watch:

1. Lost
2. The Closer
3. House
4. Bones
5. Heroes
6. Life - which I think they're cancelling. :-(
7. CSI: Miami
8. What Not to Wear

8 Favorite Fruits:

1. Red grapes
2. Gala apples
3. Pineapple
4. Oranges
5. Tangerines
6. Tomatoes - only as sauce or salsa
7. Blueberries - in muffins, cereal, etc.
8.

8 Places I Would Like to Travel To:

1. New Zealand
2. Italy
3. Ireland
4. England
5. Scotland
6. France
7. Austria
8. The rest of Europe

Happy Mother's Day

Just a Mom?

A woman named Emily renewing her driver's license at the County Clerk's office was asked by the woman recorder to state her occupation. She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.

"What I mean is," explained the recorder, "do you have a job, or are you just a...

"Of course I have a job," snapped Emily. "I'm a mother."

"We don't list 'mother' as an occupation... 'housewife' covers it," said the recorder emphatically.

I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself in the same situation, this time at our own Town Hall. The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high sounding title like, "Official Interrogator" or "Town Registrar." "What is your occupation?" she probed.

What made me say it, I do not know... The words simply popped out. "I'm a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations."

The clerk paused, ballpoint pen frozen in midair, and looked up as though she had not heard right.

I repeated the title slowly, emphasizing the most significant words. Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire.

"Might I ask," said the clerk with new interest, "just what you do in your field?"

Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, "I have a continuing program of research, (what mother doesn't), in the laboratory and in the field, (normally I would have said indoors and out). I'm working for my Masters, (the whole darned family), and already have four credits, (all daughters). Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities, (any mother care to disagree?) and I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it). But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money."

There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk's voice as she completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door.

As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab assistants - ages 13, 7, and 3. Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model, (a 6 month old baby), in the child-development program, testing out a new vocal pattern.

I felt triumphant! I had scored a beat on bureaucracy! And I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than "just another mother."

Motherhood...What a glorious career! Especially when there's a title on the door.

Author: Unknown

To Be A Mom

To Be a Mom

We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family." "We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. "Do you think I should have a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral. "I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations."

But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes. I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood.

She might arrange for child-care, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell.

She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right. I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that toilet.

However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give it up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish theirs.

I want her to know that a caesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor.

My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child. I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike. I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time. I want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts.

My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes. "You'll never regret it," I finally say. Then I reached across the table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings.

Author: Unknown

What am I worth?

I've been quite annoyed with things lately. My slow internet issues (the computer itself is fine), my bickering, slow children (they had three minutes to get to their classes by the time we got to school) and my messy house. That's not to say that I don't clean - I do. It's just that I'm NOT the maid (at least maids get a paycheck) and I shouldn't have to pick up after people who are perfectly capable of picking up after themselves. Part of me really wants to pick up what's been lying around, but I shouldn't have to. It's driving me crazy.

I guess you could say I'm feeling a little underappreciated. Even unacknowledged. As if because I'm a SAHM it's just expected that I do everything for everyone. *insert angry smilie here*

Anyone else hear about how much a SAHM is worth now? Close to $123,000. That's how much you would have to pay someone for cooking, cleaning, teaching, nursing, chauffering, counselling, doing laundry, personal shopping, child care, pet care. Kind of funny, huh? "You're worth $123,000 a year, but you'll never see it." Yeah, I know. It's about the joy of taking care of your home and family. :-/ But a little something extra now and then, even a sincere thank you and a helping hand, would be nice.

*sigh* Well, time to cook for the family.

Grrr!

Issues, Movies and Books

I haven't been online much lately because my computer has been so slow! Charlie installed something, wanting to make it faster (he said it worked for his laptop), but now everything is slower. Some pages (especially MySpace, Facebook and blogs) take forever to load, if they load at all. I've done everything I can think of to speed things back up (defragment, AVG, Spybot, CCleaner, removing unneccesary objects from the registry), but nothing's worked. I'm more than a little annoyed. My next course of action is contacting MajorGeeks for help.

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Charlie and I went on a date Friday night. We saw Wolverine and then had dinner at Outback. We hadn't been in a long time. I got the filet mignon.

On Saturday, we took Kelly to see the Hannah Montana movie (pretty cute) after eating dinner at Pizzeria L'Italiano. We also went to Barnes and Noble. Kelly got two Hannah Montana books, Charlie got a car magazine and I got Lessons in Heartbreak by Cathy Kelly and Stormy Weather by Paulette Jiles.

I bought Girl With a Pearl Earring by Tracy Chevalier and North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell on Friday.

I finished reading Child of the South night before last. I liked it okay. The story takes place mostly in Wilmington, NC, right after the Civil War. It got a little too much into the politics of that time for my liking, which took away from the story (for me) a bit.

I started reading The Reader that same night and finished it last night. It's a short book and an interesting one. A real page-turner. I haven't decided yet what book I'm going to read next. I have a lot to choose from.