I Keep on Loving You

A lady I've known since I was a little girl posted a video of a song by Reba McEntire on Facebook yesterday. I had never heard the song before. I'm not a fan of country music (there are a lot of '90s country songs I like) or of Reba McEntire (though I have always liked her song You Lie), but I like the words of this song. It's called I Keep on Lovin' You.



Love takes the patience of Job,
That's what my Mama always said.
Faith is the belief in something more than what you know,
That's what the Good Book says.
You gotta play the cards you got.
Who knows what fate is holding.
At times you gotta go without knowing where you're going.

That's why I keep on lovin' you.
I keep on lovin' you.
Through the "Baby, don't leave mes"
And "Never will agains"
And "I promise tos",
I keep on lovin' you.

Lord knows we've had our share of fights,
Our sleepless nights, our ups and downs.
We've had plenty and then some of "Baby, I'm gones" and turnarounds.
Sometimes I swear it might be easier to throw in the towel.
Someday we're gonna look back,
Say, "Look at us now."

That's why I keep on lovin' you.
I keep on lovin' you.
Through the "Baby, don't leave mes"
And "Never will agains"
And "I promise tos",
I keep on lovin' you.

Keep on lovin' you.
Through the "I take it backs",
"I didn't mean it like thats",
"I'd never hurt yous."
Oh, I keep on lovin' you

I keep on lovin' you.
I keep on lovin' you.
Through the "I take it backs",
"I didn't mean it like thats",
"I'd never hurt yous."
Oh, I keep on lovin' you.
I keep on lovin' you.
I keep on lovin' you.

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This world has made love something God never intended for it to be - conditional. Oh, people will love their children unconditionally and some will love their friends unconditionally, but when it comes to their spouses it's, "I'll love you always and keep my vows to you unless you do this, this and/or this."

That's not how it's supposed to be. God commands unconditional love between husbands and wives. People give up, walk out and quit loving too easily. And many times it's over unimportant nonsense or illegitimate reasons. Not always, but it happens far too often.

Your spouse doesn't make you happy? Why put all your happiness on them? God never told us that our happiness depends entirely on our spouses. That's a tall order that no human being could ever fill. It's not even one of the things God commands husbands or wives to do for their spouses. He commands love, He commands respect, He commands we not leave each other, He commands husbands to provide for their wives and children, He commands husbands not to be harsh with their wives, He even commands sex (yep), but He does not command we make each other happy.

Happiness depends on things that happen. Which means it can change from one day to the next. Or even one month to the next, depending on what's going on in your life. But, as a wise Christian lady said, your happiness is not superior to the command to keep the covenant you made with your spouse. When God made His covenant with us, He did not include a divorce clause (as someone else wisely put it). Nor did He say that He would honor His covenant with us only as long as we make Him happy.

Marriage, which represents the union between Jesus and the church, is a covenant that God binds us to and expects us to keep and honor. According to Romans 1, God will judge covenantbreakers.

Just as Jesus protects and provides for and takes care of His people, God expects husbands to do the same for their wives. Just as Jesus will never separate Himself from His people, God commands us to never separate from our spouses.

Anyway, I said more than I planned on saying. Back to the original purpose of this entry.

The words of that song touched me because I feel the same way about my husband. No matter what, I keep on loving him. Has he disappointed me, messed up, done or said the wrong things in the past, even hurt me? Yes, he has. People will do that to us. Even our spouses. Only God is perfect. But I keep on loving my husband. He is my one and only. The love of my life. Nothing will ever change that.

Updates

The tornado watches and warnings continue. There are tornado warnings north, west and southwest of where I live. Some are within my county. A tornado watch is in effect until 9:00 PM. I'm keeping an eye on a local news station. They're interrupting regular programming to follow the storms. Currently, the sun is shining at my house, but storms are coming.

Savannah went home from the hospital last night. There's still some infection in one of her kidneys. She will be on medication for two weeks and then they will check her again to see if things have improved. My pastor and pastor's wife are so glad to have their daughter back home.

Keeping Watch

I was looking forward to going to bed earlier tonight (Tuesday) than I did last night (Monday). Instead we have a tornado watch until 3:00 AM, so I'm staying up until then to keep an eye on the weather. There have been tornado warnings north and west of here for several hours now. I can't sleep knowing there's the possibility of a tornado. Gotta keep my kids safe. My mom lives in a mobile home about a mile from our house. If things get bad I'll call her and she'll come over.

At times like this I want my husband home more than ever. I feel safer when he's here.

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More from Psalms:

All of Psalm 91. I won't copy it here. It would make this entry very long. Read it sometime. :-)

92:13 "Those that be planted in the house of the Lord shall flourish in the courts of our God."

94:3-4 "...how long shall the wicked triumph? 4 how long shall they utter and speak hard things? and all the workers of iniquity boast themselves?"

94:9-10 "He that planted the ear, shall he not hear? he that formed the eye, shall he not see? 10 He that chastiseth the heathen, shall not he correct? he that teacheth man knowledge, shall not he know?"

94:18 "When I said, My foot slippeth; thy mercy, O Lord, held me up."

94:21-22 "They gather themselves together against the soul of the righteous, and condemn the innocent blood. 22 But the Lord is my defence;..."

95:8 "Harden not your heart..."

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It's about 2:45 and the tornado watch will expire soon. It's a little windy out with some strong gusts, but nothing bad. My bed is calling my name and has been for a few hours now. I'm going to check the radar one more time, do some reading from Psalms and pray on my way to bed. Y'all have a great Wednesday!


Update: When I got up at 7:00, I found out that the tornado watch had been extended to 10:00. There's no way I could've or would've stayed up that long. Thank God there weren't any tornadoes here.

Late Night Activities and an Update

It's after 3:00 AM. I would normally be in bed at this time, but I fell asleep on the couch for an hour or so. When I woke up around 1:30 I couldn't just go to bed. There was a kitchen and other things to clean. The kitchen I can understand. Who can stand to go to bed when their kitchen is a mess? The rest could've waited, but this happens to me once in awhile. I'll sleep for an hour or two on the couch and when I wake up, instead of dragging myself to bed, I suddenly have the urge to clean. I had to make myself stop after cleaning just a couple things. The middle of the night really isn't the time to be cleaning house.

I then had to get online to pay for Kelly's lunch last week and this week, send an email to my husband and check Facebook for updates. I found out that the doctors found an abcess in one of my pastor's daughter Savannah's kidneys. She will need surgery to have it drained and will be under general anesthesia. They say she will probably have to be in the hospital for a few more days. That poor girl! She's been through it with this kidney infection. Say a prayer for her, please.

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I had a parent/teacher conference with Kelly's teachers yesterday. They both said that she's sweet, well-behaved and smart. :-)

I made stew for supper last night. So good! It takes a lot of work to make, but it's worth it once it's done. Kelly and I both had two bowls of it.

Well, I need to do some reading (Psalms), pray and go to bed. Y'all have a great Tuesday!

Two Songs and an Update

Church was so good yesterday. We sang a beautiful song as a congregation called Revelation Song.



Savannah, the pastor's daughter, is still in the hospital. Turns out she has a kidney infection, not a burst appendix. Her mom was with her at the hospital. I gave my pastor the card for Savannah and he said he'd give it to her when he went to see her.

This song was sung softly while we prayed in the altar:



It's a little after 1:00 AM now. I'll be going to bed soon. I only slept four hours Saturday night. I'm surprised I've lasted this long on so little sleep without a nap. I tried to take a nap, but just as I was dozing off while watching the race, my mom brought Sean home. I need to get off of here quickly so that I can read a little from Psalms before going to bed.

A couple things I read in Psalms recently that I liked:

84:10-11 "...I had rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my Lord, than to dwell in the tents of wickedness. 11 ...no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly."

Y'all have a great Monday!

The Last Song

Just a quick entry before going to bed. I'm feeling a little talkative. If Charlie were here and awake, which he never is at this hour, I would talk to him. But he's asleep in North Dakota, where he's working.

Kelly and I watched The Last Song last night. I liked it better than The Back-up Plan. The Last Song is another movie based on a book by Nicholas Sparks. His books (of which I've read a few) are always set in coastal NC. In The Last Song, the setting is Wrightsville Beach, but in the movie they changed it to an island in Georgia. Just as they changed the setting of Dear John from Wrightsville Beach and Wilmington to Charleston, SC. Leave it in North Carolina, people! Safe Haven, Sparks' newest book, which I finished reading a week or so ago (I gave it 3 out of 5 stars at GoodReads), is set in my hometown of Southport and will also be made into a movie. I hope they film it in Southport.

Anyway, we liked the movie. I'd give it 3 out of 5 stars. It's quite sad towards the end and I had to fight back tears.

One or two songs by Miley Cyrus are played in the movie and the credits. One of them, When I Look at You, I first heard many months ago and thought it was really pretty. I'm not a Miley Cyrus fan, but neither do I dislike her, despite some of the poor choices she's made. I'm not one to totally write a person off, especially one so young, because of mistakes they've made. In Miley's case, I blame her parents for allowing a minor to do the things she's done and for the inappropriate way she sometimes dresses.

Anyway, on the DVD/Blu-Ray of The Last Song you can watch the music video of When I Look at You. The locations used are just gorgeous.



The song is about the person loved being an inspiration and someone to lean on and count on. While listening to it last night on the Blu-Ray, I suddenly thought of God and it brought tears to my eyes. He has been my greatest inspiration and my true strength. I can count on Him more than anyone else.

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Well, I need to shut things down for the night. It's nearly 3:00 AM and we have church in the morning. I'll read some more from Psalms, do a little picking up and pray as I make my way to bed. Y'all have a blessed Sunday!

More This and That

Got Sean's hair cut yesterday, but couldn't find any black church shoes for Kelly. What we did see was either more than I wanted to pay or they didn't have her size. I'll try again next Friday. We rented a couple movies instead (The Back-up Plan and The Last Song) and picked up some food at Taco Bell (for Kelly and me) and Bojangle's (for Sean) since it was getting a little late to cook. We watched The Karate Kid (the new one) while eating. Actually, I slept through most of it, even though I think it's a great movie. I watched The Back-up Plan after the kids went to bed. It was cute in parts, but there were also parts I wish had been left out entirely. Especially anything involving the support group. I give it 2½ out of 5 stars.

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Savannah, our pastor's daughter, is doing better today. Pastor said that the first two days were "really trying". The thought of her sick and in pain, and my pastor and pastor's wife hurting for her, brought me to tears. I bought her a card at the grocery store yesterday. I don't know if she'll be at church tomorrow or not. I don't expect her to be. If she's not, I'll give it to my pastor or pastor's wife for her.

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Been trying to do some cleaning today, but my energy left me quickly. Despite the fact that I slept about 8 hours last night. *shakes fist at PCOS* Fatigue is one of my PCOS symptoms. I've gotten a few things done today - laundry (still working on that), changed shower curtain liners in the hall bath, put groceries away, emptied the trash in the hall bath. I still need to vacuum, clean out the litter boxes, sweep up kitty litter, wash dishes (it's mostly bowls and spoons), empty a couple more trash cans, clean up a spot in my bedroom carpet. *sigh*

Some days I have no fatigue at all and can just go, go, go. Others I can get a few things done in short bursts of energy. Many days I really have to push myself to get anything done. Today started out feeling like I'd have one of my non-stop days, but it quickly faded and now I'm struggling. I'm having to force myself just to get up and put a new load of laundry in the washing machine. Blah. Hopefully I'll have another burst of energy and can get a few more things done.

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After watching The Karate Kid last night, Kelly put the little plastic cup from the cheese that came with her nachos on top of Sadie's head. She then put a coaster and bottle of water on Sadie's side. Didn't seem to faze Sadie at all. We thought it was funny how she just laid there, not seeming to care, considering how touchy and sometimes downright evil Sadie can be. lol



Oh, and speaking of The Karate Kid, I have a confession to make. I actually found myself feeling just a little bit attracted to Jackie Chan. I've seen him in a few other movies and felt not the slightest twinge of attraction. But something about serious, brokenhearted, older-looking Jackie Chan as "Mr. Han" was attractive to me. I just wanted to hug the poor, sweet guy. He's completely different from my usual crushes - Orlando Bloom, Jude Law and Gerard Butler. Not that they're not sweet, especially big-hearted Orlando, but they're younger than Jackie Chan and are what most people consider heart throbs. Jackie Chan is "funny, goofy, martial arts guy". It was good to see him in a serious role. I'd love to see him play serious characters more often. He's quite good at it.

Well, it's about supper time. Haven't decided yet what we're going to eat. Later, Kelly and I will be watching The Last Song. Sean's at my mom's house.

Church in the morning. Very much looking forward to it, as always. Y'all have a good rest of the weekend.

This and That

I laughed so hard at Sean last night. He wanted to glue a handlebar back on a toy motorcyle and grabbed the Elmer's glue. I told him it wouldn't work, but he used it anyway. A while later, he came up to me with the motorcycle and said, "Remember how you said the glue wouldn't work? Look." He then grabbed the handlebar and it came right off. You should've seen the look on his face. It still makes me laugh when I think about it. He kept saying, "It's not that funny", which just made it funnier. I laughed for a long time.

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I was outside with the kids for a little while yesterday evening. We saw a large spider (orb weaver? something like that) making a web on the front of our house and watched "her" (I keep calling it a her for some reason) for several minutes. Kelly said to me, "How can you look? Don't you think it's creepy?" I said, "Yes, but it's also fascinating." And it was. Watching her go up and down as she created her web. Kelly threw a blade of grass into the web and we watched as the spider cut it from her web and then rebuilt it.

Click to enlarge.

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I have to take Sean to get a haircut today and get Kelly new church shoes. Hopefully I can find some for a good price. Preferably $20 or less.

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Those who believe in prayer, please pray for my pastor's 16 year old daughter, Savannah. (The older girl Sean has a crush on. He keeps asking questions about what a burst appendix is and so on. I think he's worried about her.) She went into the hospital Wednesday with what they believed was a burst appendix. There has been a "little complication" (don't know what) and the doctors say she could be in the hospital for 5 or 6 days. Pray God heals her and that she can leave the hospital sooner than that. She is a sweet girl who loves the Lord.

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Love is patient [suffers long] and is kind. It does not envy. It does not boast. It is not proud. It is not rude. It is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered. It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres [endures all things].

Love never fails.

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"There are four things you can never recover: The stone after the throw. The word after it's said. The occasion after it's missed. The time after it's gone."

"What is a man profited if he gains the whole world but loses his family in the process?"

"Love is a house we enter and commit to never leave, so lock the door behind you and throw away the key."

Day Trip

Mom, the kids and I went to the mountains on Monday. It was a lovely day. We enjoyed riding down the Blue Ridge Parkway, taking in the views as we traveled and at overlooks.

Pilot Mountain

At Cumberland Knob.

Brinegar Cabin

At Brinegar Cabin

At Alligator Back overlook.

As we did last year, we stopped at the Northwest Trading Post to shop. I bought a few small loaves of pumpkin bread (man, I love that stuff!), Kelly got a small stuffed racoon that she named Bandit (my suggestion) and Sean got an animal tracks guide and a poisonous plants and critters guide. Kelly got one of the guides too, but I can't remember which one.

When we reached Boone around 3:30 or so, we went to the Dan'l Boone Inn Restaurant for supper. There was a line out the door, which surprised me considering how early we got there and the fact that it wasn't the weekend. But since we only get to eat there about once a year or less, we waited. The line wasn't as long as it's been other times that we've gone, so it wasn't a big deal to me.

They serve their food family style at Dan'l Boone Inn Restaurant. (No menus; dishes of food are brought to your table.) I had the fried chicken and mashed potatoes and gravy. I had been craving mashed potatoes and gravy for about a month. They tasted so good! Kelly loved them too. Along with the potatoes (2 servings), she had chicken, country style steak (2), salad, corn, and green beans (2 servings). That little girl can eat! Sean didn't eat anything. (We got him Bojangle's after we left the restaurant.) He's ridiculously picky. For dessert, I had the chocolate cake (I scraped off the icing), Kelly had the strawberry shortcake and Mom had the banana pudding.

Their country ham biscuits are fantastic, but I didn't eat any at the restaurant. I brought them home and Kelly and I ate them that night.

It was rush hour when we left the restaurant and Mom didn't want to drive through the road construction area during rush hour, so I had her go the opposite direction into Blowing Rock where we killed some time at Shoppes on the Parkway. (I was disappointed that they don't have the Christmas shop anymore.) I bought myself four dark chocolate covered cherries for $1.25 each (goodness!) at the candy shop. Kelly got three or four chocolate covered caramels.

At Shoppes on the Parkway. This picture doesn't really do justice to how pretty the sun shining behind the shops was. I need a better camera. :-/

After getting gas, we were back on the road by just about 7:00 and were home in less than two hours.

If we get to go to the mountains again next Fall, we want to just go straight into Boone and spend time doing things just in that area - Grandfather Mountain, Linville Caverns and Linville Falls. We might also go to the Mystery Hill house as well if we have time. We went there once several years ago and the kids would like to go again. Sean barely remembers going and Kelly doesn't remember at all. We'd also like to go to Tweetsie Railroad, but it's expensive to get in.

It was really nice to get away for the day. Especially on such a pretty one.

Just a Mother?

I'm sure you've all read this before. I was reading a blog earlier that reminded me of this story. I had to search online for it, but found it eventually. Comments to follow.

A few months ago, when I was picking up the children at school, another mother I knew well rushed up to me. Emily was fuming with indignation.

"Do you know what you and I are?" she demanded. Before I could answer (and I didn't really have one handy) she blurted out the reason for her question.

It seemed she had just returned from renewing her driver's license at the County Clerk's office. Asked by the woman recorder to state her occupation, Emily had hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself. "What I mean is," explained the recorder, "do you have a job, or are you just a .....?" "Of course I have a job," snapped Emily. "I'm a mother." "We don't list 'mother' as an occupation ... 'housewife' covers it," said the recorder loudly.

I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself in the same situation, this time at our own Town Hall. The clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high-sounding title like "Official Interrogator" or "Town Registrar."

"And what is your occupation?" she asked. What made me say it, I do not know. The words simply popped out. "I'm a Research Associate in the field of Child Development." The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair, and looked up as though she had not heard right. I repeated the title slowly, emphasizing the most important words.

Then I stared with wonder as my pompous pronouncement was written in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire. "Might I ask," said the clerk with new interest, "just what you do in your field?"

Cooly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, "I have a continuing program of research (what mother doesn't) in the laboratory and in the field (normally I would have said indoors and out). I'm working for my Masters (the whole darned family) and already have four credits (all daughters). Of course the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities (any mother care to disagree?) and I often work 14 hours a day (24 is more like it), and the rewards are in satisfaction rather than just money." There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk's voice as she completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door.

As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab assistants - ages 13, 7, and 3. Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model (6 months) in the child-development program, testing out a new vocal pattern. I felt triumphant! I had scored a beat on bureaucracy! And I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than "just another mother."

Motherhood ... what a glorious career. Especially when there's a title on the door.


This is a good story, except for this one part of it: "I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than 'just another mother.'"

I personally can't think of any job more indispensable than "mother". There are a few that are equally indispensable, but none greater or more indispensable.

"The career of motherhood and homemaking is beyond value and needs no justification. It's importance is incalculable." -- Katherine Shor

"A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path." -- Agatha Christie

"I'd rather be a mother than anyone on earth
Bringing up a child or two of unpretentious birth...
I'd rather tuck a little child all safe and sound in bed
than twine a chain of diamonds about my carefree head.
I'd rather wash a smudgy face with round, bright, baby eyes
Than paint the pageantry of fame or walk among the wise."
-- Meredith Gray

"Motherhood is not for the faint-hearted. Frogs, skinned knees, and the insults of teenage girls are not meant for the wimpy." -- Danielle Steel

"One good mother is worth a hundred schoolmasters." -- George Herbert

"When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child." -- Sophia Loren


Being a mother is my greatest calling in life. There's nothing else I'd rather be doing than taking care of my children and our home.

Recipe: Lemon Oregano Chicken

I made lemon oregano chicken for supper last night and served it with rice pilaf, black eyed peas, broccoli and crescent rolls. Lemon oregano chicken is one of my favorite meals. It's so delicious!

Ingredients

Chicken (I like breasts, but use legs or thighs if you prefer, or a mixture.)
Olive oil
Chicken broth
Oregano
Garlic powder or cloves
1 large lemon (More if making more than 2-3 pieces.)
Salt
Pepper


Pour enough chicken broth into the bottom of a pan (rectangular glass pan or metal cake pan) to more than cover the bottom, but not so much that it covers the chicken when added. (Don't you just love precise measurements? Sorry. I don't measure when making this.) Pour in a little olive oil and add salt and pepper. (I like to mix things a little with a fork.) Place chicken in the pan. Season with salt, pepper, a little garlic powder (or add chopped or minced garlic cloves), and oregano. Squeeze in the juice of one lemon. More if you're making more than 2-3 pieces of chicken.


Put the oven rack at the highest level and broil the chicken until the juices run clear. About 15-20 minutes for breasts, depending on their thickness. The tops of the chicken will probably be dark and possibly a little crispy. This is fine and, in my opinion, quite tasty.

Tidbits

Kelly is fine now. She went to school yesterday without any problems.

Sean said he's starting to feel a little sick himself - headache and sore throat. Hopefully he'll be better by morning. I don't want him to miss school.

My throat's feeling a little sore too. :-/

We're planning on going to the mountains next week. My mom will be driving. We're all really looking forward to it. Hopefully none of us will be sick.

Feeling a little down at the moment. Won't go into why.

Still reading Psalms, though not getting to it every night unfortunately. Here's what stood out to me recently:

37:5 &7 "...trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. 7 Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him:..."

37:16 "A little that a righteous man hath is better than the riches of many wicked."

40:13 "...O Lord, make haste to help me."

44:21 "...he knoweth the secrets of the heart."

46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God..."

51:8 "Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice."

So tired. Going to bed soon, after I do some picking up around the house. The kids always leave things lying around before going to bed, even after I've told them to clean up their mess. They get some of it, sometimes most of it, but never all of it. I'll do my praying as I clean and will probably finish up my prayers in bed, as I sometimes do. May not get to do any reading tonight before falling asleep. I've been reading Safe Haven, Nicholas Sparks' newest book. It's set in Southport, which is the main reason why I'm reading it. My mom bought it, read it quickly and then lent it to me.

I hope everyone has a blessed Tuesday!

Fall Festival Fun Cut Short by Sickness

Yesterday was the Fall Festival at Bur-Mil Park. We got there later than originally planned, but still with plenty of time to enjoy the festival. Unfortunately it turned out to feel more like a Summer festival with temperatures in the 80s. Though the heat was a bit much for me we would've stayed longer if Kelly hadn't started feeling really bad. We left after only being there for a little over an hour. When we got home, Kelly took her temperature and it was 100.4°.

I've tried getting her to eat, but she won't. I managed to force a couple bites of chicken noodle soup and a couple bites of scrambled eggs into her. She also isn't drinking, though I'm trying to get her to. I suspect she might have pneumonia. Not only does she have no appetite and a low fever, but she's also coughing, complaining of her chest hurting (something I thought was just from coughing) and a little while ago I noticed her breathing fast in her sleep. It's after 2:00 AM and that it could be pneumonia just occured to me about half an hour ago, after noticing the way she's breathing in her sleep. I plan on calling the doctor's office after hours number (the pedicatrician's office isn't open on Sundays) when I get up in the morning. Say a prayer for Kelly, please.

Anyway, back to the festival. Kelly didn't feel like participating in anything, but Sean got to do a couple things before we had to leave - archery and kayaking. I hated that we couldn't stay longer and do more, including games and the hayride, but I could tell that Kelly couldn't handle anymore. Poor girl.

The water didn't look that green to me. But then I was wearing sunglasses.

After getting to ride in the kayak, Sean said several times that he wants a kayak. Maybe someday. Though probably not someday soon. But you never know what the future holds.

I'll be getting in the bed soon. Just as when Sean had pneumonia this past February, I'm nervous about sleeping while Kelly is sick like this. Labored/fast breathing worries me. Again, please pray for her.

Sick Day Turns to Park Day

I had to get Kelly from school early yesterday. Her teacher called saying that she wasn't feeling well. When I went to pick her up, I knew she'd want to go to the park and of course she did. We went to Hagan Stone for a couple hours and spent most of that time walking one of the trails. It was a warm day, but the breeze was cool.




Kelly also spent a little time swinging and sliding on one of the playgrounds.


I had picked her up before lunch and after awhile we started feeling hungry, so we went to Chick-fil-A. When we were done eating, I wanted to show her this little dam and bridge we used to go down to in the Hamilton Lakes neighborhood (here in Greensboro), where I used to live when I was 18. (It's only about a mile or two from Chick-fil-A/Friendly Centre.) The park there, where the dam is located, is very wooded with a couple lakes and playgrounds and walking trails. Most people driving down Friendly Ave., a very heavily-traveled road, probably wouldn't know or expect it to be there.

Shelob!

We only stayed for a few minutes because we had to get back home and then get Sean from school. Kelly wants to go back sometime and Sean would like to go also. Mom's picking him up from school today since she's off, so it won't be today.

Tomorrow is the Fall Festival at Bur-Mil Park. The same festival I brought the kids to last year. They've been looking forward to going again for months. While Kelly and I were at Hagan Stone yesterday, I saw a sign there that said that they're having a Fall festival of some kind also. I'll have to check their website to see what activities they have planned.

Kelly stayed home from school today. I had wanted her to go, but last night she ran to the bathroom a few times feeling like she needed to throw up. Thankfully she never did. I didn't want to take the chance of her throwing up at school, so I kept her home. She's really sniffly and is coughing some, but so far no nausea that I can tell. Poor girl has Daddy's allergy problems. At least I think that's what is wrong with her today. It's the time of year for it.

The two of us will be heading out in a few hours to get groceries.

Y'all have a great Friday and a fun weekend!

Open Your Eyes and See the Other Door

My husband shared some news with me that has him worried. It's not that something has happened, but that it could. I'm not going to pretend that it's not a little scary because it is. But at the same time I know that God is in control. I've placed it in His hands and I know that He will work it out. I know that things will work out the way they're supposed to and that while it looks bad and feels a little scary, it could be a good thing in the end.

If Charlie reads this I know he will be thinking, "How could this possibly end up being a good thing?" I'll tell you how. God can bring something better for our family to replace what might be lost. And when I look at what he's afraid of losing it's not something I would mourn the loss of. It's been a hindrance in our life, not just a help. And the hindrance, which has been spiritual and emotional, outweighs the help, in my opinion.

When I look past the initial scariness of what might happen, I see great possibility. I see how that God can use what might happen to turn things around. All things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose. My God shall supply all my need according to His riches in glory. Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things [things we need] shall be added unto you.

When God closes one door, He always opens another. And many times He leads you through that new door to a better life and better opportunities and greater blessings. Blessings that aren't just material, but more importantly, spiritual. Don't mourn the closing of the first door. Open your eyes and look for the other door God is opening and rejoice!

Whew! I just encouraged myself. Just like David. I mentioned in my previous entry that I've been reading Psalms. As I was reading the other night I said, as if I were talking to David (pardon the bit of crazy), "I'm with you, David. I know how you feel. I'm there right now." Me and David, we seem to have a lot in common. Except for the whole adultery thing and having your lover's spouse killed.

Anyway, as I was cleaning the kitchen earlier, after Charlie's news, I was listening to a Fred Hammond CD and talking to God. This song came on and blessed me.



Just as I was about to close this entry, another song came to mind.



My life is in His hands. I can't think of a safer place to be.

I'm Not Amazing

"You're amazing."

That's what a friend of mine said to me in the altar at church last night. She had prayed with me and afterwards told me that I was amazing and that I've been an encouragment to her. I kind of laughed and said, "I don't feel amazing."

And I don't. This situation that I've been in for over a year now has been such a struggle. It's the worst thing I've ever gone through. I often feel angry, frustrated and discouraged, and many times I wonder when things are going to be good and normal again. (Though I'm hoping for better than good and better than normal when all is said and done.) The weariness of it can make me feel pretty down sometimes, to the point of tears. I pray that God will help my anger and my sometimes lack of faith.

The friend I mentioned is one of the few who knows what's going on in my life, though we haven't actually talked about my situation in a few months. She said that I'm "so strong" and that she would be focusing on me in prayer this week.

Strong. Amazing. No, I'm not strong or amazing. I'm just holding on. When people ask me how I'm doing, my usual answer is, "Good. Hanging in there. Believing God."

If I appear strong, it's only the strength of God that people see. Without Him, I wouldn't be here. For those of you who don't believe in God or aren't interested in the things of God, that is your choice. But He has been my strength. It is God and God alone who has gotten me through, kept me alive and kept me sane.

My friend, she's been in a struggle of her own, but I think things are finally turning around for her. I'm so glad. She's had problems with her husband. I've prayed for her and her husband many times that God would give her strength and that He would show her husband, who does go to church, pray, read the Bible, etc., what He requires of him as a husband, a man and a saint of God. My friend told me a few weeks ago that they were working things out. And she recently commented that she's proud of him for how much closer he's gotten to God. It's made a difference. It makes my heart feel good for them to know this.

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I recently decided to read through Psalms. I try to read 5 chapters (or divisions, as I've heard is what they really are) a night. Last night I read 31-35. Good stuff. Here are some of the things I underlined that really stood out to me.

31:3: "...for thy name's sake lead me, and guide me."

31:15 "My times are in thy hand:..."

34:7 "The angel of the Lord encampeth round about them that fear him, and delivereth them."

35:1 "Plead my cause, O Lord, with them that strive against me: fight against them that fight against me."

35:12 "They rewarded me evil for good..."

35:15, 17, 22 & 26 "...they did tear me, and ceased not: 17 Lord, how long wilt thou look on? rescue my soul from their destructions, my darling [my precious life; my only one] from the lions. 22 This thou hast seen, O Lord: keep not silence:... 26 Let them be ashamed and brought to confusion together that rejoice at mine hurt: let them be clothed with shame and dishonour that magnify themselves against me."



This next song is my song. My story. My testimony.



I almost let go.
I felt like I just couldn't take life anymore.
My problems had me bound.
Depression weighed me down.
But God held me close, so I wouldn't let go.
God's mercy kept me, so I wouldn't let go.

I almost gave up.
I was right at the edge of a breakthrough, but couldn't see it.
The devil really had me,
But Jesus came and grabbed me.
And He held me close, so I wouldn't let go.
God's mercy kept me, so I wouldn't let go.

So I'm here today because God kept me.
I'm alive today only because of His grace.
Oh, He kept me
God kept me.
He kept me, so I wouldn't let go.


It's not me who is amazing. It's God and His love for me.

Beautiful October and a Beautiful Song

It is now one of my favorite months of the year. I love October! October in North Carolina is beautiful with its changing leaves and comfortable temperatures - highs in the 60s and 70s, lows in the 50s. We do still get some 80s in October from time to time, but they're pretty much gone now. While I love Autumn, I know that it being October means that winter will be here soon. I hate winter. My least favorite season, even if our winters are much milder than what they get up north.

We're hoping to take a day trip to the mountains again this year in a couple weeks. We had such a great time last year. I hope the weather will be just as beautiful this time as it was last year when we went.

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I've been busy cleaning house today, doing laundry and trimming bushes outside. The bush-trimming is actually kind of pathetic. I don't have shears/hedgers/whatever they're called and while we do have electric ones in the garage, I don't want to use them. I imagine they're loud and vibrate too much. So I used an old pair of scissors. The bushes don't look perfect, but they're better than they were.

I'm going to be starting supper soon, after I thaw out the meat. We're having tacos and refried beans. I'm skipping the enchiladas this time. I'm not in the mood for them and don't feel like making them.



"What do you see when you look at me? If you don't know my story, make no assumptions." -- Facebook status.