This and That

My heart, my love and my prayers have been with my husband's family today. I hurt for my nephew's mother and siblings. Things like this just shouldn't happen. :-(

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This song has been on my mind since Saturday night:



What a beautiful, powerful song.

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Not feeling well today. Headache, slight feeling of having been run over by a truck, general blahness. I hope I'm not coming down with something.

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I read a really great article over at Marriage Moment called Love is Not Self-Seeking.

"The focus of marriage used to be on advancing family, community, and society. Now the focus seems to be on what the individual can get out of the relationship emotionally, financially, and otherwise. And, all too often when a marriage not perceived to be fulfilling these functions sufficiently it is discarded or abandon in pursuit of another relationship.

In order to find real joy and contentment in your marriage and in life you must first learn the lesson that love is not self-seeking. You must come to accept that times of personal unhappiness are sometimes necessary. A commitment to love involves a commitment to sacrifice. Putting the best interests of your relationship with your mate in front of your personal welfare will ultimately benefit both you and your partner. Loving God’s way never fails."

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"Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get." -- Dale Carnegie

"When you refuse to talk to your spouse, you're hurting your marriage. Eliminate your pride ... talk!"

"When spouses are not communicating, the devil is able to sow lies and other wicked seeds into each spouse's mind."

"Husbands: What you did to get her is what you do to keep her. Never stop dating your wife."

"One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again." -- Judith Viorst

Death in the Family

I got one of those phone calls today that we all hate to get. My nephew Spencer, on my husband's side, was found dead this morning. He was only 21. It's such a shock. We don't know for sure yet how he died.

Those who believe in prayer, please pray for my husband Charlie and his family. Especially Spencer's parents and 3 siblings.

Things on my Mind

While watching Sean at Karate last night, we found out that the owner of the dojo was in the hospital with a blood clot in his lung. If you pray, say a prayer for him please.

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For some reason, the scene in The Color Purple where Celie tells Mister, "I'm poor, black, I may even be ugly, but dear God, I'm here. I'm here!" popped into my head earlier. I kind of feel that way about myself. I'm in a situation I'd rather not be in and "I may even be ugly", but I'm here!


Fast forward to 7:50 to hear the line I quoted.

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Another thing that popped into my head tonight is a song called Satan, You're a Liar. Good song. Anything I hear or feel that goes against what the Bible says or what I believe God has for me is a lie. Sometimes I feel down and defeated and like things aren't going to work out. But it's a lie! I am not defeated and things will work out!

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I've posted this song before. I just love the beat and of course the words. Probably my favorite line is: "Got a hot wife, don't need to be a pimp!" :-D

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And now a few quotes, including two more marriage quotes from my preacher "friend" at Facebook.

"The right to do something does not mean that doing it is right." -- William Safire

"Spend some time listening to God about your marriage. Then do whatever He tells you to do."

"Loving your spouse is one of the ways you love and serve God."

Dreams and Expectations

I've been a dreamer all my life. I can still remember being awake in my bed late at night when I was a little girl and dreaming about going to Toys R Us and filling cart after cart with all the toys I wanted. Mostly Barbie stuff.

I no longer dream about shopping sprees at Toys R Us. My dreams these days are more adult and some are of a spiritual nature.

Other than my spiritual dreams, I don't really expect my dreams to come true. By that I mean that I don't demand it. I don't tell God to make my non-spiritual dreams come true and I don't make demands on my husband to make them happen either. And yet I sometimes feel like maybe Charlie feels pressured by my dreams. I'm really not sure why. I don't share my dreams with him often and I make no statements that would suggest that I expect him to make those dreams come true. Yet he's said things in the past about my wanting things we can't afford. I scratch my head and try to explain to him that I'm only dreaming and have never expected nor demanded that he do something about it.

For instance, I would love for us to have a bigger home. Something with four bedrooms (one of them would be for our library), a den, a fenced-in backyard, the 3-car garage Charlie wants. But this dream house, while larger than what we currently have, is not a mansion by any means, though he seems to think that I want some huge, expensive house. I would even be okay with this dream home needing some paint and updating. I try not to be too picky. I've shared this dream with Charlie a few times, but have made no demands and never said that I want anything huge or fancy. I'm really not the fancy type.

Another dream I have is to go to New Zealand and several European countries. Again, I haven't demanded it. In fact, if I ever get to visit another country I will be surprised.

Charlie hasn't really said anything about that dream, but I've gotten the impression a few times that for some reason he thinks that I expect him to make my dreams come true even though I've never said that I do. I've simply told him what my dreams are in life. Dreams and expectations are two different things.

I really don't know why he interprets my dreams as expectations. All I expect from him are the things that most wives expect of their husbands and the things that God's Word requires of husbands. Anything else really are just lovely little extras.

I've placed my dreams in God's hands. He's in control and if it's His will for whatever I dream to come to pass, it will happen. If not, I'm okay with that. As long as I have what truly counts in life - God, church, my husband, my kids, the basics of life, health, etc. - then that's all that truly matters.

It's my spiritual dreams that matter most to me. Spiritual dreams for myself, my husband, my kids and my church. These are the dreams I most desire to see come true. Dreams that are much more than dreams. They are, I believe, also necessary for our lives and for eternity. These dreams I do expect to come true and I will not be satisfied until they do. I pray daily that God will make these things happen and I have faith that they will. I can't imagine God not bringing these things to pass. Because He loves me and my family and because what I'm dreaming of and asking God for are supported by His Word.

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"No person has the right to rain on your dreams." -- Martin Luther King

"If you can dream it, you can do it." -- Walt Disney

"All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers." -- Orison Swett Marde

"There's no excuse not to dream."

“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.” -- Henry David Thoreau

Pretty Dresses, B-Day Party, Marriage Quotes

Kelly and I did the usual Friday grocery shopping this past Friday. I was also able to get her a new dress for church. It was on sale at JCPenney for less than $24, before tax.

Close-up of the rosette detail along the neckline. Click to enlarge.

I was able to get her another dress today and a few shirts (I couldn't find a picture of the third one), which were all on sale.

JCPenney

Belk

Belk

It's hard for me to believe that she's already wearing a size 14 in dresses. I was wearing a size 14 when I was 13 years old. Kelly will only be 11 in a couple weeks. And she almost needs a size 16 in dresses for the length. A size 16 is too big for her as far as how it fits her body (she tried on a 16 today), but is just about right for length. When it comes to shoes, she can almost fit into my size 6's perfectly. She's probably going to be taller than me. Not that it takes much - I'm only 5'0".

Charlie got Sean a new belt for school (which he needed badly) and some pants. Now he just needs a couple long-sleeved polos, which can be hard to find for some reason. Seems like most stores only sell the short-sleeved polos. Sean also needs new church clothes and church shoes. Kelly needs a few more church dresses, church shoes and skirts for school. Which are also hard to find unless you want mini-skirts. We don't.

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Yesterday was my niece (on Charlie's side) Samantha's 11th birthday. We went to Raleigh, where she lives, for her party. There was skating, Mexican food, presents and an Oreo ice cream cake. It was nice to spend time with family.

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More marriage quotes that a preacher "friend" has been posting on Facebook:

"Bitterness eats away from the goodness that God has given to us in marriage." -- Paul Buckness

"Working marriages need spouses who have marital backbones that can withstand the hard times of marriage." - Love that one!

"Are you blaming your spouse for YOUR attitude, mistakes, choices, actions, inability to be happy, etc?"

"GOD created the institution of marriage and defined it on HIS terms as the central institution of human society. We'd be wise to follow that."

"Spouses: Be committed to the vow you've made despite the differences or challenges you may face."

"Marriage is a commitment; a promise to stay with your spouse for the rest of your life. Are you keeping your promise?"


And a non-marriage quote:

"One of the most important ways to manifest integrity is to be loyal to those who are not present. In doing so, we build the trust of those who are present." -- Stephen Covey

Marriage Quotes

One of my Facebook "friends" is a preacher up in Virginia. Apparently he's been teaching about marriage lately on Wednesday nights at the church he pastors. He's shared a few things on Facebook that I really liked. I copied and pasted them to my computer where I keep a very long list of favorite quotes. I actually have two long lists of favorite quotes.

"In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage." -- Robert Anderson

"Love your spouse so well that you make your friends and neighbors jealous."

"A negative attitude, a negative mouth, and negative behavior will net you a negative marriage."

"Your spouse is far more important than guests: So he/she should get better treatment than they do."

"Choose your spouse over all other human relationships." -- Ooh, I really like that one a lot!

"The Christian is supposed to love his neighbor, and since his wife is his nearest neighbor, she should be his deepest love." -- Martin Luther

A quote by another preacher I'm a "fan" of on Facebook had this non-marriage thing to say:

"You can choose your sin, but you can't choose your consequence." -- So true.

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And now for more from Proverbs.

21:2, 4, 6, 13
"2 Every way of a man is right in his own eyes: but the Lord pondereth [examines] the hearts. ... 4 An high [haughty; conceited] look, and a proud heart, and the plowing [lamp; evil actions] of the wicked, is sin. ... 6 The getting of treasures by a lying tongue is a vanity [fleeting; a waste of time] tossed to and fro of them that seek death. ... 13 Whoso stoppeth his ears at the cry of the poor, he also shall cry himself, but shall not be heard."

21:16, 21, 23
"16 The man that wandereth out of the way of understanding shall remain in the congregation of the dead. ... 21 He that followeth after righteousness and mercy findeth life, righteousness, and honour. ... 23 Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles."

21: 28-29
"28 A false witness shall perish [will be cut off]: but the man that heareth [listens to the truth] speaketh constantly [will speak forever]. 29 A wicked man hardeneth his face [bluffs; puts on a bold face or front]: but as for the upright, he directeth his way [thinks before he acts; prepares his way]."

Happiness and What it Means

"All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him [or her], it will not change you. The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off you when you are looking for external reasons to explain your unhappiness or frustration. You may succeed in making another feel guilty about something by blaming him [or her], but you won't succeed in changing whatever it is about you that is making you unhappy." -- Wayne Dyer

My friend Carmen posted this on her blog. I liked it so much I had to "steal" it and post it on my blog. It's so full of truth. If you find yourself unhappy, don't point fingers at others. (Unless it's an abusive relationship.) Look within yourself.

This reminds me of another quote, which I've shared on my blog before:

"If the grass looks greener on the other side, fertilize yours."

If things look better somewhere else, walking away from your life won't bring you happiness. Make things better right where you are. "Bloom where you are planted." Walking away because you feel unhappy won't solve anything. You'll just bring the unhappiness with you wherever you go.


Thinking about the first quote reminded me of my entry about selfishness, which I wrote over a year ago. It is pure selfishness (and self-centeredness) to unjustly blame someone else for your unhappiness and then decide that in order to "be happy" or "find happiness" you must cut that person from your life, even if doing so will cause them great heartache. You both know, though you won't admit it, that it's not their fault you're unhappy. They've done nothing to deserve being blamed for your unhappiness.


What, beyond momentary circumstances, brings happiness? In my opinion, it's the following things:

Gratitude. It's so easy to take people for granted, including our spouses, and to not be thankful for all they do for us. Even more important than that is to be thankful to God.

Commitment to God and/or your spouse and your family. Be faithful, be true, be constant, without end.

You must also be able to forgive whatever wrong is done to you and have unconditional love towards your spouse, your children and your family. As a matter of fact, God commands such love. Especially between husbands and wives (Ephesians 5:25, Titus 2:4) and from His people towards others.

Generosity, in all its forms (of spirit, monetary, time), is essential for happiness. I mentioned selfishness earlier. You cannot live a selfish life and be happy. Spend time with your spouse, your children, your family. Spend money on occasion, even if only a little. Especially if it meets a need. Do not withhold your heart or your affection from those who love you and from those who you are supposed to love.

Kindness. I don't care what rude people say, they are not happy. How can you be happy when you treat your fellow man (or woman or child) poorly? Lend a helping hand, smile, hold doors for people, meet a need, use polite words. I have yet to feel unhappy because I did something for someone else.

Trust and honesty. How can a person be happy if their mouth is full of lies? And how can they be happy if others lose trust in them because of their lies? Tell the truth, keep your word, be a person of honor. People will know they can count on you and they will trust you.

Knowing you have a purpose in life, something (or someone) you're working for or living for, brings happiness and real satisfaction. Even if you hate your job, try to focus more on why you're working or who you're working for (to support). If you persevere, you can find a better job. Don't let your job be the source of your overall life's happiness. (Though, of course, I hope you're happy with your job.) Just keep in mind, "I'm doing this for my kids. I'm doing this for my family. I'm doing this for my spouse. I'm doing this for God."


Happiness isn't something you pursue or seek after. ("The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet." -- James Oppenheim) It's not something that's based on your circumstances. It's all about your attitude and disposition and having your priorities in order. What's that old saying? "The main thing is have the main thing be the main thing." Or something like that. :-)

For Christians this should mean God first, others second and yourself last. And saying that you should be last does not mean that you neglect yourself. But so many have the order all wrong. They put themselves first, and some even make themselves their only priority, and then they're shocked when they discover they are unhappy. I will say it again: Selfishness does not bring happiness.

Well, I've run on long enough. I hadn't intended to write so much. I started off thinking this would probably be short. :-/ It's nearly 3:00 AM. I've stayed up later than I planned to or thought I would. Time to go to bed.

Y'all have a great Thursday!

Pretty Dress, Giving Away Dessert, Awesome Church

Kelly and I went in search of either a new skirt for her for school or a new dress for church on Saturday. We didn't have any luck in the skirt department. (Why do people think it's okay for girls to wear mini skirts?) But we did find several dresses at Macy's that could possibly work. Kelly tried on about six dresses and we ended up choosing a very pretty black one (black velvet on top; silver on the bottom) for just under $18. The original price was $78! I love a sale.


We then went to the video store to rent a couple movies. We chose Salt and Nanny McPhee Returns. Salt was pretty good. Nanny McPhee Returns was a little too silly for my tastes, but Kelly liked it.

While Kelly and I were out on Saturday, I saw a woman who was asking for "anything you can give". She said she didn't have anything to eat or anywhere to go, that the urban ministry was full. I didn't want to give her money in case she wanted to use it to buy drugs or alcohol. Instead I gave her our dessert from Olive Garden (zeppoli) and the two breadsticks we had. She thanked me nicely and walked on.

Kelly said she was really looking forward to eating the zeppoli and I said that I was too, but I felt like I should give it to the lady. I called Olive Garden and placed a new order for zeppoli, which Kelly and I went and picked up. We brought it home and enjoyed it while watching Nanny McPhee Returns.

Yesterday morning while I was getting ready for church, I thought about how I'd given away our dessert. I hadn't thought about what the Bible says about it at the time that it was happening. As I was getting ready for church, these scriptures came to mind:

Hebrews 13:2
"Be not forgetful to entertain [show hospitality, kindness or love to] strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares."

Matthew 25:34-40
"34Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:
35 For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.
37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?
38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?
39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?
40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."

Wow. I know some don't believe in angels, but I do. I'm not saying that lady was an angel. But what if she was? Or she could've just been someone God put in my path on Saturday to see how I would react. You just never know. Whatever the case, it blessed me to bless her. I wasn't thinking about that at the time - how it might bless me or what it might do for me. It's only been since those scriptures came to mind yesterday morning that I've felt blessed by what I did.

Anyway, church yesterday was so good! More than good. It was awesome! An older lady (50s) who goes to my church put it this way on Facebook, "It was off the chain!". There were a lot of people there. The most I've seen in a while. We usually run about 220-230, but it looked like there were quite a bit more there yesterday. And not everyone who's normally there (or should be, such as Charlie and Sean!) was there. If everyone who normally is there or should be there had been there we probably would've needed extra seats.

We sang four great songs as a congregation (Blessed be Your Name, The More I Seek You, Running, and Freedom), our pastor's daughter and our keyboard player sang a song (He Wants it All) and then the choir sang a couple songs (Freedom Is, and Souled Out). The worship was beautiful and powerful. One of those services you wish could keep on going.

Our pastor preached about Waste Places (Isaiah 51:1-3, 11) and how that God can turn our wastelands into something beautiful. And how that He can help us not to dwell on our pasts, what others have done to us or the wrongs we've done, to not become bitter or depressed. But instead to see our past as something to learn from and to help others who may be going through what we've been through. It was a great message.

After church, Mom took us out to La Hacienda to eat. We hadn't been there in a while, since Mom last took us there. It was quite good.

No school today, so I'll be sleeping in a bit. Speaking of sleeping, I really need to get in the bed. It's nearly 3:00 AM. I didn't expect to stay up this late, considering how sleepy I am.

Have a great Monday!

Snow Days, Last Night, Proverbs

The kids didn't have school again on Thursday. Yesterday was a 2-hour delay. And now after having so many days off due to snow and ice, they have a three-day weekend. Monday is Martin Luther King, Jr. day. And then Friday is a teacher workday. I haven't heard anything about the school system using that as a make-up day. I think they should. Rather than sending the kids to school on a Saturday, as some systems are doing and I wouldn't put it past our school system to do it, I think they should send the kids to school on the teacher workday and let a Saturday be the teacher workday. That's my opinion on the subject anyway.

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Kelly and I are going grocery shopping today. I normally do it on Fridays, but it was just too cold yesterday. It's still going to be cold today, somewhere in the mid-40s, but not as cold as yesterday, which was in the 30s.

We're going to try to get Kelly a new skirt for school and/or a new dress for church if we can find them on sale for a really good price. (I'd prefer no more than $10 for a skirt and no more than $20 for a dress.) She badly needs more school skirts and church dresses, as well as church shoes. And Sean really needs a couple more school shirts, church clothes, a belt (school dress code) and church shoes. I'll get Sean a new belt next time and hopefully find a shirt for him for school also.

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My mom took Sean and Zach (my nephew; my brother's step-son) to the monster truck show last night. (Charlie's in Richmond working.) That's really not my thing, or Kelly's, at all. While they were gone, Kelly and I watched Pride and Prejudice on Blu-Ray and ate some chocolate chip cookies, warm from the oven. :-)

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I'm really sick of winter. I've never liked it. And it seems like the older I get the more I hate it. I know people say, "Just wait till summer. You'll be wanting colder temps." Not me. Even in the heat of summer, I don't look forward to winter at all. And as summer comes to an end and the temperatures begin cooling down, I absolutely dread winter. I'd much rather it be summer than winter. Though fall and spring are my favorite seasons.

Anyway, these cold temperatures have got me longing, not only for the end of winter, but also for a trip to a warmer place. Somewhere tropical maybe - Puerto Rico, the Bahamas, the Virgin Islands, Hawaii. *sigh* I know. Keep dreaming. :-/

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I haven't posted anything from Proverbs in a while. I'll pick up where I left off.

Proverbs 20:1, 7, 17, 20 "1 Wine is a mocker [scorner; makes people foolish], strong drink [beer; alcohol] is raging [leads to fights; makes people noisy]: and whosoever is deceived thereby [led astray by wine/alcohol; under their influence; delighted by them] is not wise. ... 7 The just man walketh in his integrity: his children are blessed after him. ... 17 Bread of deceit [stolen bread; bread gained by fraud] is sweet to a man; but afterwards his mouth shall be filled with gravel. ... 20 Whoso curseth his father or his mother, his lamp shall be put out in obscure darkness."

20:24, 27, 29 "24 Man's goings are of the Lord; how can a man then understand his own way? ... 27 The spirit of man is the candle of the Lord, searching all the inward parts of the belly [innermost being; heart]. ... 29 The glory of young men is their strength: and the beauty of old men is the gray head."

Tidbits and Quotes

No school again today. Secondary roads are still covered with ice. Spring Break will be very short as a result of missing school this week. Temperatures are supposed to be above freezing, so maybe some of the ice will actually melt today. I expect there to be school tomorrow with maybe a 2-hour delay, but we'll see.


I don't understand people who apparently think, "As long as I'm happy I don't care how anyone else feels. Not even family."


I usually do the grocery shopping on Fridays, but I may wait until Saturday or Sunday this week if I can. Temperatures are still only going to be in the 30s on Friday. Saturday should be around 40° and Sunday close to 50°.

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"A home is built on the foundation of love, commitment and a shared history. It is decorated with forgiveness, acceptance, rituals, discipline and mutual support."

"I've carried a child within my body. I've slept with a baby on my chest. I have kissed boo-boos, mended broken hearts, been puked on and peed on, and spent sleepless nights in a rocking chair. But I wouldn't have it any other way. My body isn't magazine perfect, but when I look in the mirror I see a Mom, and there is no greater blessing."

"What is love? Love is when one person knows all of your secrets... your deepest, darkest, most dreadful secrets of which no one else in the world knows. And yet in the end, that one person does not think any less of you; even if the rest of the world does. Love is just a word until someone comes along and gives it meaning." -- Marvin Sapp

“Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit.” -- Peter Ustinov

"Do I work? Yes! I work 24 hours a day. Why? Because I'm a mom! I am a chef, a cleaner, a parent, a teacher, a referee, a counselor, a nurse, a handy-woman, a maid, a bodyguard, a comforter and more. I don't get holidays, sick pay or a day off. I work through the day and the night. I am on call at all hours. Now tell me my job isn't a real one!!"

Sledding

We got a nice thin layer of ice on top of the dusting of snow we got. The kids used the boogie boards to go sledding down our icy driveway today. With the road also being very icy and slushy, any cars that came by (you could hear them coming before they reached our house) had to move slowly.

I laughed so hard I was crying as I watched them slip and slide their way back up the driveway.

It's very cold today. It didn't get above 30°. Brrr! Because of that I didn't let the kids stay out very long. Now I've got more laundry to do from them sliding and rolling around. But first, a shower for me and then to get supper started. Spaghetti tonight.

Lazy Monday

I have a love-hate relationship with lazy days. They start off feeling so good. No pressure to get this or that done. Of course, this is only true if the house isn't in complete disarray. After a few hours though and I'm no longer enjoying my day of doing nothing as much I was in the beginning of my day. It's good to take the day off once or twice a week. I'm a firm believer in the body's need for relaxation and recuperation. I relish in it when I can. But, as I said, the feeling is short-lived. Suddenly the feeling of relaxation changes and I feel a bit stressed. "My goodness! I've done nothing!" *sigh*

The kids didn't have school today because of forecasted snow and ice, which didn't begin until after school normally lets out for the day. On days such as this, when the kids are home, it's easier to be lazy. Sometimes even when the house is in complete disarray. Unless it's a Saturday. Saturday is when I do most of the cleaning and laundry.

So now it's late in the evening and I've done pretty much nothing. I hadn't been online since late Saturday night, so I spent a good chunk of time today catching up with friends and family at Facebook and reading my favorite blogs.

In my defense, I haven't felt well since last night. Normally that wouldn't stop me, but the headache I've had since last night encouraged my laziness today.

Here's hoping I feel better tomorrow and can actually get something done around here.

As for the kids, no school again tomorrow. Since frozen precipitation finally began falling in the afternoon, it's been a mix of snow and sleet. Currently the precipitation outside our door is of the sleet/freezing rain variety. Roads are too dangerous to be out on.

I'll be so glad when winter is gone and temperatures are in the 70s again.

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I wanted to add in that I really enjoyed my pastor's message yesterday. He preached from Isaiah 41:14-16 and Psalm 22:1-6.

"I'd rather be a worm with God than a giant without Him."

I'd rather be a worm with God than someone big and tough and important without Him. I rely on God. The giant relies on himself and doesn't come close to being as happy or succesful (which can be more than wealth or job performance) or victorious as the one, the worm, who relies on God and allows God to fight his battles and allows God to use him according to His will. God's blessings are always greater than whatever a life without God can do for a person.

That's not to say that the one who relies on God is a worm. Relying on God doesn't make you a worm. What makes you a worm is that you are lowly and sinful and nothing without Him. It's about recognizing who and what you really are without God. By relying on God and living for Him, you can become something great and beautiful in Him. You can go from crawling on the ground to soaring like an eagle. If we humble ourselves, He will lift us up.

Forgiveness

"Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it." -- Mark Twain

"As you sojourn through life, forgive. No matter what has been done to you, said about you, or how painful it may be. In the end you will feel the warmth of the tapestry of love you've created." -- Juan L. Christian

“Forgiveness is the key that unlocks the door of resentment and the handcuffs of hate. It is a power that breaks the chains of bitterness and the shackles of selfishness.” -- William Arthur Ward

This always makes me cry:



"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." -- Mahatma Gandhi

"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you." -- Lewis B. Smedes, "Forgiveness - The Power to Change the Past," Christianity Today, 7 January 1983

"He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass." -- George Herbert



"Forgiving is love's toughest work, and love's biggest risk. If you twist it into something it was never meant to be, it can make you a doormat or an insufferable manipulator. Forgiving seems almost unnatural. Our sense of fairness tells us people should pay for the wrong they do. But forgiving is love's power to break nature's rule." -- Lewis B. Smedes

"Never does the human soul appear so strong as when it forgoes revenge, and dares forgive an injury." -- E.H. Chapin

“To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.” -- Robert Muller



“Never forget the three powerful resources you always have available to you: love, prayer, and forgiveness.” -- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

“He who is devoid of the power to forgive, is devoid of the power to love.” -- Martin Luther King, Jr.

“True forgiveness is not an action after the fact, it is an attitude with which you enter each moment.” -- David Ridge

Powerful song:



All these quotes about forgiveness reminded me of this song too:

2010 Meme

I was reminded of this meme I did last year after seeing it at my friend Susanne's blog.

1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?

Watched people doing Karate after signing Sean up for it.

2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I didn't make any. Just hopes. Only two happened.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes, my brother's wife Jennifer gave birth to their son Drake on December 27th. My niece Jessica gave birth to her son Colton in September.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

My sister-in-law Vicky passed away in August.

5. What countries did you visit?

None. :-(

6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?

My husband Charlie. He was gone far too much. :-(

7. What date from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

December 27th, the day Drake was born. :-)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Pretty much the same as last year. I kept my sanity, thanks to God. 2010 was trying, to say the least.

9. What was your biggest failure?

I can't think of any. Nothing big enough to remember anyway. Oh, other than failing to expect someone to take something the way it was meant instead of blowing it completely out of proportion.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

No. Just the usual awfulness of PCOS.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Sheets and quilts early last year with my Christmas money and birthday money, a few movies on Blu-Ray, stuff for my kids.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

I'll just quote what I wrote last year:

"Mine. lol Well, maybe not celebration exactly. But just the fact that I haven't killed a certain someone and have managed to be patient (not without difficulty), forgiving and keep believing is almost a miracle. Not because I'm usually the opposite of these things. But because the situation has been extremely trying."

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Like last year, I'm not going to say. If he or she reads this, they should know it's them I'm referring to.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Other than bills, it was groceries, gas and things for my kids.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Things I believe God is going to do for me and my family.

16. What song(s) will always remind you of 2010?

I Want it All Back, by Tye Tribbett and G.A.; Broken/Don't Pass Me By, by IBC; I Give Myself Away, by William McDowell; I Am God, by Kirk Franklin and Toby Mac; To Worship You I Live, by Israel and New Breed, and a few others.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. Happier or sadder?

ii. Happier. Thanks to God. He gave me peace and hope.

iii. Thinner or fatter?

iv. About the same.

v. richer or poorer?

vi. About the same.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Traveling, praying, fasting, reading my Bible.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Crying and worrying.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?

I spent it at home with my husband and kids.

21. How many one-night stands?

Eww! None! My husband is my one and only and always will be.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

The Closer, Bones, Chase, The Good Wife, House Hunters International.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

I don't hate anyone.

24. What was the best book you read?

Voyager by Diana Gabaldon and The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

None come to mind.

26. What did you want and get?

New sheets and quilts (they were needed), some movies on Blu-Ray. I didn't get what I want most, but I'm trusting God to make it happen.

27. What was your favorite film of this year?

Eclipse, Leap Year, The Blind Side, The Karate Kid.

28. What did you do on your birthday?

Nothing. :-/ My daughter's birthday is the day after mine, so we focus on her.

29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?

Classic, modest, feminine.

30. What kept you sane?

God, lots of prayer, church, talking with friends.

31. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Orlando Bloom. He's been my biggest celebrity crush since 2002. I also really like Jude Law and Gerard Butler.

32. What political issue stirred you the most?

Nothing really. I don't get stirred up much by politics.

33. Who did you miss?

Charlie.

34. Who was the best new person you met?

I don't think I met anyone new.

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010.

Same as last year - there's nothing more important than God and family.

This and That

It felt good to be at church on Sunday. Finally, no sickness or weather problems to keep us away. This Wednesday I think we're having church outside. There will be a bonfire, if I heard correctly. (I was a little distracted.) I think we're going to write some things down and burn them. I think . I didn't hear everything that was said. If that is what's going to happen then of course it's only symbolic. We're not into magic or anything.

Kelly and I saw Tangled on Sunday. We both really liked it. (I give it 4 out of 5 stars.) There are very few animated movies I truly enjoy and Tangled is one of them. Can't wait to own it on Blu-Ray.

In case anyone is curious, the other animated movies I really like are Beauty and the Beast, Monsters Inc., Shrek 2 and A Christmas Carol. Growing up, I loved Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella and The Little Mermaid. There are several other animated movies I like okay (such as Kung Fu Panda, The Prince of Egypt, Up, The Aristocats, The Lion King, Mulan), but not as much.

Speaking of movies (though not animated), someone gave my mom a Wal-Mart gift card and she then gave it to me. After leaving Karate last night, the kids and I went by Wal-Mart and got Prince of Persia and Sherlock Holmes (only $10!) on Blu-Ray. We'll probably watch them Friday and/or Saturday night.

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I was reading an article online a couple days ago and people responded to the story the way many respond to things nowadays -"Well, as long as she's happy that's all that matters." I personally disagree with that statement. Being happy is not all that matters. Sometimes what makes a person happy can make others miserable. And that's not okay, in my opinion. At least not when the other people being made miserable are the ones who love you and ones you are supposed to love.

Nor is it okay, in my opinion, if what makes a person "happy" is flat out wrong. It's very much not okay. We can get twisted in our minds or our hearts and begin to desire things we should not desire. If you begin feeling like you "have" to have a certain thing or participate in a certain activity or make a change in your life in order to be "happy", and that thing or that activity or that change is wrong or a sin or will hurt those who love you, you need to stop what you're doing and get your mind and your heart straightened out. If you pray for God to help you to resist that temptation or to help you no longer desire the thing you should not desire, He will help you.

It takes prayer and sacrifice and time, but if you put it in God's hands and determine that you're not going to do that thing that you should not do or that will hurt those who love you, you can resist it and you can eventually no longer even want it. I have seen it and I have experienced it.

Y'all have a great Tuesday!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year everyone!

As it does every New Year's, this past year seems to have flown by. I have high hopes for 2011. After the emotional hell that was the majority of 2009, I entered 2010 also feeling hopeful. There were many downs in 2010 and many tears, but I also grew spiritually. Though things weren't made right last year as I hoped and expected them to be, God gave me peace and strength to endure. I've learned a lot through all of this. I'm expecting God to set some things in motion this year (if He hasn't already) and to finally bring about the end of this trial I've been going through by finally making things right and whole and good again.

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Kelly and I went to the church last night to pray in the new year. (Sean is in Raleigh again. :-/ ) There weren't as many people there as I expected there to be, but it was a great time of prayer.

Looking forward to church tomorrow. Between sickness and snow, we missed several services in December. I'm ready to get back into making it to church every service again. I've missed it. We may go see Tangled after church.

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And now for more of Proverbs:

19:5, 9, 11, 14 "5 A false witness shall not be unpunished, and he that speaketh lies shall not escape. ... 9 A false witness shall not be unpunished, and he that speaketh lies shall perish. ... 11 The discretion of a man deferreth his anger [a man's wisdom gives him patience]; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression [and it is to his glory to overlook an offense; he earns respect by overlooking wrongs]. ... 14 House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent [discreet; virtuous; understanding] wife is from the Lord."

19:16, 20, 22 " 16 He that keepeth the commandment keepeth his own soul [keep the commandments and keep your life]; but he that despiseth his ways shall die [despising the commandments leads to death]. ... 20 Hear counsel, and receive instruction, that thou mayest be wise in thy latter end. ... 22 The desire of a man is his kindness [what a man desires is unfailing love and loyalty]: and a poor man is better than a liar."

19:26-28 " 26 He that wasteth [robs; mistreats; assaults] his father, and chaseth away his mother, is a son that causeth shame, and bringeth reproach. 27 Cease, my son, to hear the instruction that causeth to err from the words of knowledge. 28 An ungodly [corrupt; worthless; untruthful] witness scorneth judgment [mocks justice]: and the mouth of the wicked devoureth iniquity [gulps down evil; seizes evil eagerly]."

May you all have a blessed, successful, wonderful, glorious, stupendous, love-filled, joyful 2011!