Showing posts with label Loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Loss. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 7, 2022

Family Reunion, A Death, Books, and Clothes

In my last entry, I wrote about Charlie being sick and a home covid test coming back positive. The test that was done at CVS came back positive the next day - Thursday, August 18th. By early the next week, he was feeling mostly better.

Kelly was sick on Saturday, August 20th - nausea, body aches, and a headache. Her symptoms were quite a bit milder the next day and she was better by that Monday.
 
Thankfully, I never felt sick.

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This past Saturday, September the 3rd, my dad's side of the family had a reunion at my cousin Christian's house in Wade, NC. (Out in the country, northeast of Fayetteville.) Of my immediate family, only my mom and I went. :-/ 
 
It was a mostly pleasant trip there and back, but as it's been for years (decades), the traffic gets bad as you get close to Spring Lake until you get on the other side of Fayetteville. (Going through Sanford used to be really bad too until they built/rerouted the highway around Sanford.) I always dread that part of the trip. It's just madness in those small cities - Spring Lake, Fort Bragg, Fayetteville. It seems like there are more people than there is road space for them to travel on. Not to mention all the young G.I.s from all over the country - mostly young males who are notorious for their bad driving. Though I imagine getting a traffic ticket may not sit well with their superiors.
 
Anyway, there was a big tent set up in my cousin's backyard with three big fans to keep us cool. It was a hot, humid day (which somehow always feels more miserable in the sandhills) and after awhile, I had to go inside the house. I was feeling lightheaded from being too hot. Something that's always been a problem for me, to the point of nearly passing out. I sat inside for a while and then went back outside and sat closer to a fan. That helped a lot. It was actually cooler in front of the fan than it was in the house. Probably because people were in and out and that probably made it harder for the house to get cool.
 
When it was time to eat, I got up to get my food, but nearly fell down because I was just too lightheaded from the heat. My mom went and got my food for me. They had fried chicken, macaroni and cheese, barbecue, collards, rolls, biscuits, sweet tea, pineapple upside down cake or pig pickin' cake (can't remember which), banana pudding, nilla wafer cake, and I don't remember what else. I only ate a chicken breast and two rolls.
 
It was nice seeing my family. I think the last time I saw them was at my uncle Mike's funeral in September 2016. I wish more could've been at the reunion. I think around 40 were there. 
 
Those who were there included my dad's siblings: Aunt Kathy, Uncle Daniel (lives in Florida), Aunt Robin (she was married to Uncle Mike), and Uncle Marty. And Uncle Marty's wife, Aunt Stella. 
 
My cousins: Shannon and her husband Scott; Michael W. and his girlfriend (don't remember her name); Jessica, her husband Scott, and their kids Elijah, Sarah, Daniellah, and Rebeccah; Christian, his wife Kim, and their daughter Emma; Michael L. and his wife (don't remember her name), and his daughter from his first marriage, Madi. My cousin Christine came by briefly, but then left to get her kids - Magen, Matthew, and Nathaniel. My mom and I left before she came back.

There were also some of my paternal grandma's family there - originally from Massachusetts, but I think they live in NC now.

I wish Charlie, Sean, Kelly, and Ashley had come with us. Charlie thought he was going to have to work, but the crane they were waiting on got stuck at the state border. (Don't know which state.) My kids just didn't want to go. My brother Del also didn't want to go.

Before my mom and I left, they took a family picture. We stood in the hot sun and I joked that the next reunion should be in a cooler month like October. Well, I say "joked", but I was serious. lol

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I took the last of the naproxen a couple days ago. My ankle hasn't been hurting as bad and I'm hoping it's getting better. I hope it's completely better by the time the weather turns cool. That's when I really like to go walking at Hagan Stone Park and hiking in the mountains. I won't be able to do that if I'm in too much pain and that would be a real bummer.

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A little old lady who used to go my church (before covid) passed away on Saturday. Her name was Mercedes and I sure did love her. Before covid, we would hug each other at church every Sunday. Sometimes I would go to her and sometimes she would come to me. I loved it when she would suddenly appear next to me when I was sitting in my seat. I'd look up and she'd have that sweet smile on her face. She would open her arms for a hug and I would stand up and hug her. Every time we hugged, I would tell her, "I love you", and she would say, "I love you too." She didn't know much English (she was from a country in South America), but she would do her best to say, "I love you too".

I looked forward to the day when covid let up enough for her to come back to church so I could see her and hug her again every Sunday. It hurts my heart that we never got to do that again. Her health went downhill and she was never able to come back. I recently posted about her on Facebook (in a post I shared for a fundraiser for her funeral and to cover other expenses for her husband) and I had tears streaming down my face as I wrote about her.

Sister Mercedes' family were all with her when she took her last breath. My heart hurts for her husband and the rest of her family. They're in my prayers and though I couldn't give much, I did give a little for the fundraiser.

The funeral is this Friday at the church.

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I finished reading Turbulent by T.L. Payne on August 27th. It was okay. I gave it 2.5 stars out of 5 at GoodReads. It's the first book in a series. I won't be reading the rest of them.

I started reading House of Hollow by Krystal Sutherland on the 27th and finished it on September 3rd. Probably the weirdest book I've ever read, but really hard to put down. I had to know what in the world was going on. I gave it 4 stars out of 5 at GoodReads.

I'm now reading Harvest (Surviving the Evacuation #6) by Frank Tayell.

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Before sharing purchases I've made since my last entry, I wanted to write about how much I spend on clothes now compared to when my husband made more money. He used to be a crane mechanic, which meant traveling all over the country to repair cranes. He was usually gone for weeks or months at a time. One year he was gone for over 200 days.

When a position was offered to him in the summer of 2016 to be the manager at his job (located in a nearby city), he took it, but it meant a reduction in pay. He went from hourly pay (which often meant a lot of overtime) to a salary. He would be making about 12-13% less per year. I think he's gotten a raise or two since then, but not big raises.

I won't go into how much exactly I spent in his traveling days lol, but after doing the math, and checking with a calculator to be sure, I spend about 80% less now than I did then. He makes about 12% less, but I spend about 80% less. I looked at the average of what I spent then per week and the average of what I spend now per week. This didn't include going out to eat - which I used to do 2-3 times per week, but now only about once every few months.

So, yes, I like to shop. lol Usually making 2-4 purchases per week, depending on what the total of those purchases will be. (I try not to go over $50 total, but sometimes it's a little more.) But I don't spend anywhere close to how much I used to spend.


With that being said, here are my purchases since my last entry.
 

L.L. Bean shirt dress. Bought from someone on eBay. (This is their photo.) I paid $39.43 after shipping and tax. It was the only purchase I made the week I bought it.
 

M.S.S.P. (Max Studio) skirt. Bought from someone on Poshmark. (This is their photo.) I paid $38.07 after shipping and tax.
 



Next brand purse. An English brand. Bought from someone on eBay. (These are their photos.) I paid $29.62 after shipping and tax.
 


Dream Pairs brand heels. Purchased from Amazon. (This is their photo.) $39.99 before shipping and tax, but I think I was able to get free shipping.
 

St. John's Bay purse. Purchased from someone on Poshmark. (This is their photo.) I paid $29.53 after shipping and tax.
 

Cabi brand vest. Purchased from someone on eBay. (This is their photo.) I paid $23.47 after tax. Shipping was free.
 
 
With fall coming, I've had a thing for plaid lately. The shirt dress I bought was not only because it's plaid, but because it's a long sleeve shirt dress and thicker material than my spring/summer shirt dresses. Before buying it, I had no fall shirt dresses. I'm hoping to find a couple more.

The toile skirt is one I used to have and got rid of several years ago because it was a little snug, but mostly because I couldn't figure out what top or shoes to wear with it. I have shoes now that will go with it and I'm hoping I can find a top since it's easier to find what I'm looking for shopping the thrift sites.
 
The reason for buying the white heels is that with my feet and ankles giving me trouble, I need lower heels and this brand is comfortable on my feet. I have these shoes in black, nude, blush, and yellow, and may buy red ones next.
 
I found the bird purse looking for plaid wool purses and fell in love with it. So cute! And a good price.
 
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I reckon that's it for now. This turned out to be a much longer entry than I thought it would be.

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*~*Nocturnal Queen*~*
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Friday, January 4, 2019

The Passing of a Friend

My friend Joni passed away from ovarian cancer a couple hours ago. She was just 44 years old. She was married with four kids. (Ages 12 to about 20 or 21.) We had been friends for about 16 years.

My heart is hurting. I will miss talking and laughing with her. I keep breaking down crying, even when I think I've cried all I can. But as much as I'm hurting, I know her family is hurting so much worse. I just cannot even imagine sitting by her side and waiting for her to either miraculously get better or to pass. Chemo and treatments weren't working anymore and she decided to stop and bring in hospice until it was over.

We thought she might live a few more weeks. Then things took a turn for the worse and we thought maybe another week, if that. Then the nurses said she might live 72 more hours. But she only lived a few more hours.

We (me and our group of friends) knew it was almost over and we waited with dread. Then we got the news a little after 12:30 AM that she was gone. (She lives on the west coast, so she passed a few hours before midnight on January 3rd.) And though we knew it was coming, it hurt so much. I've "ugly cried" a few times in the past couple hours. Her passing was expected, if God didn't give her a miracle, but still hard to believe.


Goodbye, my friend. Gone too soon. You will never be forgotten.


ETA: My two favorite paintings that Joni painted.

Dandelions.






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~*~Nocturnal Queen~*~
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Signature colors are two of her favorites - teal and pink. Her other favorite was coral.

Monday, January 31, 2011

This and That

My heart, my love and my prayers have been with my husband's family today. I hurt for my nephew's mother and siblings. Things like this just shouldn't happen. :-(

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This song has been on my mind since Saturday night:



What a beautiful, powerful song.

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Not feeling well today. Headache, slight feeling of having been run over by a truck, general blahness. I hope I'm not coming down with something.

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I read a really great article over at Marriage Moment called Love is Not Self-Seeking.
"The focus of marriage used to be on advancing family, community, and society. Now the focus seems to be on what the individual can get out of the relationship emotionally, financially, and otherwise. And, all too often when a marriage not perceived to be fulfilling these functions sufficiently it is discarded or abandon in pursuit of another relationship.

In order to find real joy and contentment in your marriage and in life you must first learn the lesson that love is not self-seeking. You must come to accept that times of personal unhappiness are sometimes necessary. A commitment to love involves a commitment to sacrifice. Putting the best interests of your relationship with your mate in front of your personal welfare will ultimately benefit both you and your partner. Loving God’s way never fails."
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"Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get." -- Dale Carnegie

"When you refuse to talk to your spouse, you're hurting your marriage. Eliminate your pride ... talk!"

"When spouses are not communicating, the devil is able to sow lies and other wicked seeds into each spouse's mind."

"Husbands: What you did to get her is what you do to keep her. Never stop dating your wife."

"One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again." -- Judith Viorst

Friday, January 28, 2011

Death in the Family

I got one of those phone calls today that we all hate to get. My nephew Spencer, on my husband's side, was found dead this morning. He was only 21. It's such a shock. We don't know for sure yet how he died.

Those who believe in prayer, please pray for my husband Charlie and his family. Especially Spencer's parents and 3 siblings.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Loss


One of the worst things in life is the loss of a loved one. Two years ago, I lost my maternal grandpa, two great-uncles and my dad. Last year, I lost my mother-in-law and my cousin Tammy. I had hoped and expected (foolishly, I know) that I could make it through this year without losing someone else.

A couple days ago, my cousin Chance passed away. He was only 26 years old and had a small son named Jaylon. I hadn't actually seen Chance since my own son (who's now 11) was a baby. Still, this has been a sad time.

I remember when Chance was a baby. I was about 10 or 11 years old. I would hold him, play with him, change his diapers and hold both of his hands while walking him up and down my maternal grandparents' house. That was so long ago, it seems.

Chance was diagnosed with epilepsy when he was in his mid to late teens. He had been told by the doctors not to play video games as it can trigger seizures. The other day, he was playing a video game (for a couple hours), as he enjoyed doing, when he had a pretty bad seizure. It caused him to fall out of bed, hit his face on a wall and it knocked him out. Actually, it more than knocked him out as it caused his brain not to receive the oxygen it needs. He was put on life support and then had a heart attack. The heart attack is what ultimately killed him, though they may have taken him off life support anyway due to no brain activity.

It's all just so shocking and tragic and sad. I can't believe he's gone. Chance's parents (his dad is my mom's brother), obviously, are beside themselves with grief.

Chance leaves behind a son, two siblings (a brother named Justin and a sister named Kasey, both younger than him; Kasey being the youngest), an older half-brother named Ray (not sure they ever met), his parents, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends. He was loved and will be missed.