Goodbye, Milo
September 18, 2010 - January 16, 2025
I don't remember everything that happened over the last months of Milo's life or at least not the order everything happened in or exactly what month things really changed.
Sometime between mid-summer and early fall (perhaps earlier?), Milo no longer wanted his prescription food. We knew that, considering his age, he probably didn't have much longer to live. A year at most, but I knew that wasn't likely. (I figured spring at the latest.) So, we decided to let him eat whatever he wanted. (And I'm already crying as I type this.) We tried giving him some dry food and he seemed to like that, but he got tired of it after a couple weeks or so.
Then we started giving him canned food and when we figured out what his favorites were (chicken stew, chicken with vegetables and gravy, a couple others) those were the ones I bought him. He really loved it for 2-3 months or more. It was good to see him wolfing it down, even though we knew it wasn't the best for his liver. But we figured it was better than him starving.
By late December (maybe?), it was more of a struggle to get him to eat. If I put broken up Club crackers in his food, that helped. He really liked those crackers. We tried other people foods as well, but as time went on, he ate less and less. He was getting really skinny and we knew he didn't have much longer.
There were about three or four vet visits in his final month - blood work and so on, appetite stimulants, medications, etc. The appetite stimulants didn't really seem to help.
Oh, he also started just walking around the house aimlessly (especially the living room) and it was difficult to get him to settle. Sometimes he'd get stuck at a wall or furniture and I'd have to redirect him. (His sight wasn't great and I think he was having cognitive issues.) He'd sleep briefly and then get up to walk around and around. We could also tell he was probably in pain. We would give him medicine for that, as well as something to help him sleep. Just walking around and around had to be exhausting for him.
I had taken him to the vet about a week or less than a week before he died for a pain shot and to have him checked. The vet didn't feel anything in his abdomen, but when it got to where he wasn't eating at all (you could tell he really wanted to eat - he would go up to his bowl, sniff his food, maybe lick it, and then walk away) and it looked like his sides were swelling/sticking out, I brought him back to the vet on January 16th. They did an ultrasound and/or x-ray and saw swelling on or in or near his liver. The vet commented on how fast things had taken a turn for the worse. She also said that he was a tough little dog to have lasted as long as he did with liver failure.
I was at home (his appointment was a drop-off) and the vet called me with the bad news and also recommended putting him to sleep. She said we could do it that day (a Thursday) or the next day. After crying, I texted Charlie at work and he said what I was thinking that even though we weren't ready to say goodbye to Milo, we didn't want him to go through another day and night of suffering.
Charlie came home from work and then we went to the vet to say goodbye to Milo. Charlie and I both did a lot of crying while we spent some time with Milo. I think it was probably about 45 minutes. He had pain medicine and something to calm him, so he wasn't hurting. When the vet came in to put Milo to sleep, I had to leave. Charlie stayed until Milo was asleep and then came out to the car before Milo took his last breath.
Gosh, this is so hard to write.
I cried a lot those first few days after Milo died. Charlie took it much harder.
Some time in March or April, the guys who work with Charlie pitched in to buy him a beagle puppy (a boy), but Charlie said he wasn't ready.
I sometimes miss having a dog, but I don't really want another one. The barking, having to let them outside to potty multiple times, day and night, regardless of weather, the smell and having to bathe them often, etc. Cats are much easier.
I do miss Milo from time to time. Even though he only seemed to love me when Charlie wasn't around. lol Though he did act more excited to see me when I came home from somewhere in about the final year or two of his life and he would often choose to lay by me instead of Charlie when we were sitting on the couch.
Poor Milo didn't deserve the suffering he went through in his final weeks. He was so pitiful at the end. It hurt to see him that way. We really tried to get him better and the vet told us that we did a great job taking care of him and loving him.
After Milo passed, Charlie chose to have him cremated and his ashes are in a box with his name on it on Charlie's nightstand. The vet also gave us a card and several ink paw prints and paw prints in clay.
I gave Milo several nicknames over the years. I don't think I'll remember all of them, but these are the ones I do remember:
Julio, Meelo, Meatloaf, Meaty Loaf, Julio Mulio Bulio, Punk, Punkers, Punk Dog (btw, our cat Loki is the punk cat), Punker Dunker, Punks, Mr. Stinky, Mr. Dog. I can't remember what other things I called him. I also had a couple songs I made up for him. I do that for all my pets. lol
Milo loved being a dog. lol He loved barking at the neighbors and people walking by and people riding bikes. He hated the UPS truck. lol Just that one. He didn't seem to mind Amazon or FedEx. lol
His favorite toy was Lamb Chop. We had bought him several over the years. We still have them. Our new kitty Effie loves playing with them - rabbit kicking them especially. He liked some dogs, but really loved cats. His first best friend was our cat Sam. When Sam died (January 2017), we got Loki (March 2017) and he became Milo's new playmate. They were so funny together - nipping, chasing, tackling.
Milo would get so excited when Charlie would come home. He had this high-pitched bark that he only did for Charlie. He would also jump up on Charlie a lot and when Charlie would throw one of his toys (usually a Lamb Chop), Milo would run to get it. He didn't do that as much his last couple years. He had arthritis in his hips and was getting too old for that.
If Charlie left, Milo would howl for him to come home. He absolutely loved Charlie. If anyone, even me, got too close to Charlie, Milo would growl and bark. He was protective of Charlie. But as I said earlier, he seemed to love me when Charlie wasn't around lol and started showing it even when Charlie was around in his last couple years.
Milo also loved being outside, especially if Charlie was outside, unless it was raining or snowing. He got cold easy, so Charlie would usually make Milo come inside if he was shivering, even if Milo didn't want to come inside.
Milo loved going for walks at the park, but he no longer could handle all the walking a few years ago. When it got to where he was lagging behind, we'd have to pick him up and carry him. I'm not sure when the last time was that I brought him to the park. Maybe four or five years ago. I wish I could've brought him one more time, even if I had to carry him.
Well, this has gotten pretty long. We will always miss him. I'm sure especially Charlie. Milo was his "buddy".
